Most Meaningful Moments

People call it a bucket list - things that they want to experience or accomplish in a life-time. Well, I am not into lists. There are some things I have never thought about doing, which I have done, like climb a mountain at age 55. Or canyon-eering off the edge of a waterfall at 58.  It's one of those crazy unplanned  stuff that happens along the journey of life. I have never even heard of the term before

until now. I am acrophobic - that's fear of heights. I get jittery just looking down the balcony of a high-rise (for me, that means anything above 2 storeys) apartment. So my first impulse was to say no to the proposal to go jump off a cliff into unknown depths. My plan was to follow on the trek and wait for the gung-ho youngsters at the very safe bottom of the waterfall. That way I wouldn't miss the beauty of the famed Kawasan Falls of Cebu and still be in one piece. So we all got started off with a rickety ride, using old sputtering motor-cycles, 3 persons squeezed onto one machine, bumping over dirt tracks, convoy-style,  into the jungle.

However, things don't always work out as we intend. So it was,  watching tourists and my own family of 4 line up to take their turn dropping off into the beautiful waters, I thought what the heck, might as well go for it. After all, it's just a jump of 10 m.  Easier said than done, for  I stopped short right at the edge, and literally did a U-turn to 'pusing balik' not once but twice - what a comedy. And when I did jump, it was a classic flop.  In spite of  the guide having told us how to do it properly - go in feet first, keep your hands at your side, etc etc - I landed splat on my face and chest. They should circulate my video as a perfect example of how not to do canyon-eering.  The pain was very bad; I felt like my face and chest was exploding into pieces, even padded with a life-vest,  I was literally knocked out of breath. Thank God my guide was quick to react - straight away like a true hero, he jumped in to rescue the old aunty in distress.

Well, I survived; with my face and body still intact, albeit aching like crazy. Was it worth it? Of course not, all I got was extreme pain and it's not like I got rid of my fear of heights anyway. Which is why I refused the next jump of 15 m and resolutely stuck my two feet on solid ground. In fact I don't want to do any more canyon-eering - ever. My eldest princess was the exact opposite, she wanted to do a third jump, to get it 'perfect'.  My no. 2 got somewhat stuck at the highest level jump of 15 m. Whilst her other 2 siblings just leapt off, she took a long time, gathering up her courage. But she did it finally. There was another young man who looked so fit and yet took an even longer while to jump.

Later as  I watched and laughed at the video clips the guide took of our  adventure in the forest, it struck me actually it's ok to be afraid, to be 'chicken' about certain things. It's acceptable to 'miss it' in spite of all the teaching and reminding.  It's not a shame to be laughed at. Nor does my ignominious display mean I am a failure at anything else. I don't have to 'get it right' every time; I don't have to prove anything to myself, much less to anyone else. I am so glad my God doesn't require me to be 'perfect', so glad He's always there to sort out the messes I make in life.

The day before we had a literal whale of a time - a close encounter with alive whale-shark, the largest species of its kind in the ocean. Watching the huge fish underwater gliding past so close was surreal.

But it wasn't really all that great, not that it was the shark's fault. It was all the waiting around - 2 hours just to spend 20 minutes in the murky choppy sea, swallowing lots of salty water in the process. And the crowds just showed how commercialized it all was. Still it's a must-do thing in Cebu. Just like island-hopping, chasing spotty turtles and silvery sardines . Like visiting Magellan's Cross, the spot where the famed explorer Ferdinand Magellan apparently planted the first emblem of Christianity in Philippines. For good measure we arrived in time to witness a very public Catholic mass held outside the church with many standing, holding umbrellas in the hot sun.

Indeed Cebu was a great adventure. But my best moments were actually not about the action stuff. Rather it was on the penultimate day when the kids opted to go rock-climbing and I was left to my devices, as I didn't fancy more heights. The evening before I had seen the woman lying on the kerb, with her toddler, as we ventured to try out Jollibee - the Philippines version of McD, which was rather different and pretty good. Already my heart was stirred. But she wasn't there by the time we came out. The next morning, I packed the extra left-over hot-dog, a packet of cookies and 2 apples and walked to the place again. But they were no longer there. I walked on further and saw another dirty bed-raggled young boy sitting outside Jollibee, which was all I needed to act. It was priceless to watch his eyes grow so big as he opened up the bag I gave to him,  jabbering excitedly to himself. But that wasn't the end of my blessing. As I turned to walk back to the hotel, there she was - the 'street' lady with her kid - hidden behind a parked van. So I went back to Jollibee and for a mere RM8, got to bless a very hungry mother and child with burger and spaghetti.  That was the most meaningful moment of my holiday indeed.

But that's still not the end. Since I had time to kill, and I really didn't fancy walking around the jam-packed roads of Cebu city in the heat, I signed up for the hotel 2 1/2 hour massage service. My therapist was a  young woman, my name-sake - Cristina. I asked her if she knew the meaning of her name; she said it was given her because she was born near to Christmas day. And then out of nowhere, she spoke of her fear of Christ. When I probed, she confessed she was afraid of sinning. That was when I told her the real meaning of her (and my) name, which I found out only after some 25  years, when I first accepted Christ at age 40 - it means "follower of Christ". How inexplicable and unexpected are the ways of a God who cares so much for us. That He would send me, a total stranger, to explain to one who never quite knew the truth -  how Christ had come to remove all sin and all fear for those who believe enough to just follow Him, not follow a system of religion, a church denomination, political parties, human saints or leaders.  It was my privilege to see her face light up with such a beautiful smile as she said in parting, in perfect understanding, "I follow Christ."

That ultimately is what life - my life-  is all about. I could go through the most awesome adventures on holidays, see the most beautiful sun-sets, experience highest joy, deepest sorrow. I could understand nothing, I could fail at everything. But one thing surpasses all - to follow Christ , for that alone brings about the most meaningful moments of life.

"For me, to live is Christ..." - Philippians 1:21 

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Chicken Dance
How Not To Do It