Makeover

 

Can't believe that's me, all dolled up... it's such a novelty, being 'made over', i am like a giggly teenager trying on her first blusher and mascara, heh heh. It's been years since I last 'painted' my face. Nowadays its only a quick touch of eyebrow pencil and lipstick before I step out the door; having thrown out my makeup set long ago, i actually need to borrow from my kids if got formal occassion that needs something more elaborate than that.
But this was the full works, complete down to false eyelashes and hair stylist thrown in. Nope, it's not a heavy date, it's not someone's wedding, it's not a special occassion... just a photo-shoot for an article on women who have survived to be published in Her World, which my eldest princess talked me into doing.

She was tasked to find women who have survived traumatic life experiences, like death, disease, bankruptcy, accidents , abuse ... all the untold tragedies of life which happen to human beings everywhere everyday. I had recommended her one of our kindy teachers who just went thru a mastectomy for removal of a cancerous breast to be one of the interviewees. And then the kiddo asked me if I could tell my story of dealing with my husband's death too. So, since she had like 2 days to get the assignment done, this mama couldn't not help, right. Anyway i figured if what i say can help bring some cheer, some hope to someone who could be facing difficult situations, why not...

And that's what got me this make-over tingy over 2 hrs at a studio one evening. Seated by my side was a famous M'sian artiste - Ning Baizura - no less, and around me walked skinny beautified waifs who were there for their own foto shoot. I felt most certainly out of place...i was sure they were wondering what this old aunty with white hair is doing dolling up, ha ha. By the time they were thru with my face and my hair, i couldn't recognize myself. It was... dramatic, to say the least, tho I must confess my hair felt like wires held together with so much gel, and my eyelids felt like they had wings (the poor girl working on me couldn't find eyelashes to mascara, so she stuck on a pair of really curly obviously false ones heh heh!)

But the worst was yet to come. Posing for the shoot was a torture. I can't understand how models do it, putting up with facing the ever-flashing camera and blinding lights this, that and 1001 other ways. Plus i suspect they must use cement to plaster the smiles on. I was so awkward; the lady kept telling me to relax, look confident.... duh, how do you do that when every 2 mins, you are bombarded with instructions to put hand here, don't bend your knees, step back, step front,stick head out, pull stomach in, aiyoh yoh.... thank God they were satisfied after about 1/2 hour strutting and some 30 shots later. My poor colleague had to endure 2 changes of clothes and 70 shots! By the time they let me walk out, my eyes were smarting, my body ached from all the physical acrobatics... i was pooped..(it figures... old aunty mah)

I got home, and just for the fun of it, kept the make-up on till dinner to show the kids... they freaked out. My son hated it, my 2 girls at least were slightly more complimentary. And I had such a tough time cleaning all the muck off. I tell myself, I like being old aunty me better, and I thank God I don't have to put on any faces for Him, other than the one He gave me in the first place, because

...." I am fearfully and wonderfully made; His works are wonderful (that's me, in the original), I know that full well." .... Psalm 139:14

A M'sian returns...

 
 

When I saw Helen's mail in my in-box, i knew something was up. Helen is not the type to email... she always says she doesn't know how to fiddle faddle with her PC - its a complete mystery to her apparently... so for her to email is most unusual to say the least... and indeed, it was to be a rare ocassion - she was headed back to sunny M'sia and stopping over a couple of days in KL, for once. That had me scrambling to somehow pull together a gathering of whoever are in KL to welcome our dear grande dame home. So it was, that on a Sunday nite, 2 guys and 4 gals from the BM/HS gang met up with her, and with each other. Ha ha, as i said, it takes a homecoming M'sian to get local-ites to gather!
Helen is... well, Helen. She hasn't forgotten her Hokkien, despite all her years in Aussieland, notwithstanding her definite 'ang mo kau' accent. The couple of hours we sat gathered around a table of KL's famous (ie famous to all except me, the 'katak dibawah tempurung' who doesn't venture out much, and definitely not to such 'hi-fi' places) Sky Bar on the 33rd floor of a hotel whizzed past much too quickly. So we ladies just had to plop ourselves down on the lobby cushions for some 'extra time'. If not for the fact that some of us had to work the next day, i venture we would still have been sitting around till the counter staff chased us out!
For me, it was also a really once-in-a-blue-moon chance to see the 2 guys; and meet their wives and Hock Seng's 3 pretty princesses. As we recalled the names of the others, it was with a tinge of nostalgia in my heart, remembering our school years, when all we had on our agenda was exams and pimples.
Now, i can only guess at how full some of our lists are - probably can churn out spread-sheets galore! And so we say we have no time; got so many 100001 things to do. Actually surely time has always been there for all of us. God has always given 24 hrs a day to each of us; no less no more than when were 15, as now when we are 50. So really its merely a matter of choice what we do with those 24 hrs. I could spend it getting bogged down with worries about my kids, my job, my watever... or I could spend it getting focused on the things of God . I could either work an extra hour (doing stuff, more of which will still be there tomorrow, and never is finished anyway), or pray an extra hour instead (which however will not add anything to my earthly bank account). The first may earn me a promotion up the corporate ladder, (and with it, more stuff to do ); the latter blesses my heart with the peace of God that transcends all human understanding.
I made my choice 8 years ago when Jesus knocked on my door...someone once quizzed me, how is it that when everyone aims to climb up the ladder, i appear to be climbing down. Ahh, i tell this fren of mine, you see, we are climbing different ladders....

..."So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal"...2 Cor 4:18

Countdown to 2010

 
 
 
 

 

This time round, the year end hols seems to be such a 'rush-y' one for me. Or maybe i must be getting older and slower so much so i am still trying to catch my breath after greeting 2010 in church on 31 dec, the last day of 2009??? What with school training, Taiwan trip, street ministry work, thanksgiving dinners, Christmas celebration with the orang asli and Indonesian brethren, it seems like the days just flew by... here i am already in January 2010, and tomorrow, i will be back to work again...

As i roll over the past 2 months 'countdown' in my mind, i hv got mixed feelings...
I am so grateful for God's many blessings thru out this year; the highlight of which must be my boy's baptism on the last nite of 2009 - the perfect icing on the cake on top of the 6As and 1 B results of his PMR( which its only by the grace of God that he managed, for the minimum studying he put in of his own effort!!)Long have i prayed that he would take this public step of obedience to God's command. And as i watched him 'dunked' into the baptism pool,this mother's heart is finally at peace, that it is done... all my immediate family has now publicly unequivocably acknowledged Jesus Christ our Savior, Lord and Master. What greater joy, what greater blessing can there be than being secured in His love, knowing for sure we are God's precious children, part of His great worldwide family of Christ-ians, and part of the multitudes that will appear together in heaven on that final day of reckoning, when every knee shall bow and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is indeed King and Lord of all...
Yet, despite all the festivities of the season, there is a tinge of sadness in my heart; for those who haven't experienced or dont want to experience such great blessing... I see the faces of the street people I minister to every Sat, i remember the long list of frens and other family members i pray over daily, i know there are billions more all over the world who have never known the One who came to save them. And my heart grieves; as God Himself surely grieves, for those who have not chosen to come back to Him....
Over the month of December, i saw many Christmas trees... different shapes, sizes, all beautifully decorated of coz. But as I admire them, there is 1 other tree that comes to my mind. A huge, ugly tree, shape of a cross. That tree was raised on a hill top more than 2000 years ago; on it was hung not whimsy pretty decorations, but the bruised and broken body of the Savior of the world in public demonstration of God's great love for mankind. That tree stands tall in my mind's eye; and i take consolation that becoz Jesus bore it, died hung on it but rose alive 3 days later , there is hope for man to be saved.
So as 2010 begins another chapter in the history of the world, i thank God not just for the blessings that He can (and does) give , not just for what He can do, but above all, for who He is - our loving compassionate merciful Father, who wishes none to perish but all to come to repentance and everlasting life - and what He has already done - provided Jesus as Redeemer and Savior of our souls.

"...Christ has rescued us from the curse pronounced by the law. When he was hung on the cross, he took upon himself the curse for our wrongdoing. For it is written in the Scriptures, "Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree..." Gal 3:13

Check out http://www.picasaweb.google.com.laisaikhoon for pix of countdown to 2010

where heaven meets earth...

 
 
 
 

Taipei was a blast, tho a rather short one. I never knew Taiwan had so much to offer the tourist; now thanks to a dear fren who palmed off her unused ticket on me, I got to spend 3 1/2 days in the land where heaven meets earth (or so she tells me ). Now i know why she likes going back.. Taiwan's got everything for everyone - shopping, sights, food... wat else can a gawky-eyed tourist ask for?! I actually nearly missed my flight.. thanks to an express bus which wasn't quite express enuf, the gates had closed 10 mins before i rushed up to the counter... but thank God the man behind it was in good mood and let me thru, just in time to present myself at boarding gate.
My first impression of Taipei after hopping on board their city bus shuttle on arrival was bleh, how drab and drabby it is.. coz the buildings were old, and gray, and flat, and it was drizzling and cold and cloudy.. But first impressions are deceiving (should hv learnt that by now, you wld think!) By the time i checked into the budget hotel, my eye balls were glazed over trying to take in the crowds of people, shops, sounds, etc etc.
God was really good to me; He kept the worst of the rains till my last day . The rest of the time was refreshingly cold cold cold. I was ill-prepared for the freeze tho, so had to don 2 T-shirts out, ha ha, never believe everything you read on the Net; it said 19 degrees, i thot that was tolerable .. instead it plunged down to 15!!. I did the mandatory city tour on my own, hopping aboard bus and MRT, only got lost once (heh heh,going wrong direction )... Taipei transport is super efficient and so clean; people actually Q to board and bus drivers announce approaching destinations; tho of coz it made little sense to a white banana like me... still with a smattering of broken Mandarin, Hokkien and sign language, i managed to find my way around. There was so much variety, so much stuff I ended up not knowing wat to buy, so i decided to forget about the shopping, and concentrate on the seeing...
And the seeing was best, especially in the country side.. i registered for 2 out-of-Taipei tours, and enjoyed them thoroughly; it was well worth the money. Spending 1 day ooo-n-aah-ing the fantastic Taroko gorge (supposedly one of the wonders of Asia) where at one spot, looking up at the sky, it appears as if heaven really does meet earth! The other tour was to the coast and up to Chiufen, a hill village which used to be an old gold/coal mine . I thot I hv seen sea in M'sia, but you aint seen nothing until you see the real ocean.. I saw a 'small' sample of the Pacific ocean, and its... mindblowing. Unfortunately my camera ran out of battery just at that point, so didn't get many shots.
What struck me as we wound our way up the hill were, of all things, the cemeteries. Cut into the side of the hill were little 'houses', not the drab tomb stones of our M'sian Chinese graves, but really elaborate and quite sizable structures , with colorfully painted designs on their roof tops and walls. My tour guide commented must make sure the dearly departed have a nice house even in death. It was on the tip of my tongue to tell him there's a much much more beautiful house in heaven waiting for those who know how to get hold of the keys to enter!
Tho a part of me wished i could explore more, but by the end of the 3rd day, honestly, i was already home-sick. People say i shld have gone with some company instead of alone, but its not really that. I hv no problems travelling alone; tho i am surprised everybody seems to think me weird for doing that. The only disadvantage is i hv to foot all the bills myself and i can't eat all the food i wanna eat since no one to share with, hee hee . It's just that after 3 days away, I was so happy to be greeted with a welcome home greeting in Engleesh as we landed, and i never knew i could appreciate hot air so much as i stepped out of the LCCT terminal!... Simple things that jolts you into recognizing that home is still home.
As i settle back into the old familiar routine of life, my heart is full of gratitude, remembering i have a home which God Himself has prepared waiting for me, one which surpasses any and all earthly homes, and therein I shall dwell, secure in His goodness and His mercy...
....Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands... 2 Cor 5:1

Check out story in pix at http://picasaweb.google.com/laisaikhoon

Something good out of something lousy

 

 

 

 

And it all started with cendol pulut.. what was supposed to be a short drive to Penang took us 10 hours...... well, actually it started when a local budget airline (supposedly the best in the world) messed up our family annual holiday trip. We were booked to go to Manado, Sulawesi for 3 days, but discovered to our shock, only on the way to the airport that the plane had left w/out us, becoz of a reschedule which wasnt informed to us beforehand. So, there we were, with all our bags packed and nowhere to go for the next 3 days..... but i guess God has a way of turning something good out of something lousy... the family council decided finally to head up to Penang instead. (the younger 2 had to be 'bribed' with a promise of shopping tho!) Truth be told i wasn't that eager to go, but no. 1 princess insisted we go somewhere, anywhere... and i m glad she did... coz we all had an unexpectedly grand time... thanks to a handy little thing called GPS....
Which my bro was fiddling with... i was most impressed by the gadget... his was a hi-tech version, got ultra sultry voice to alert which way to go ..plus listings of food and places of interest... so it was that Ms GPS directed us to cendol pulut somewhere in a little kampung called Simpang Pulai off the NS h'way..
It was really littel, and really way out; actually on the road to Camerons. Just a nondescript hut, literally by the road side. Makes you wonder how on earth it got listed on a sophisticated GPS!! But it was gooood. And so started our free-n-easy drive... guided by Ms GPS who directed us next along a bumpy, dusty earth trail to an off-the-track hot springs enclave in the middle of nowhere...
This wasn't the well-known tourist spot which charged a fee for entry. This was absolutely wild, free and all for us only (since it was a week-day).. we had such a fun time dipping alternately in the hot pools and the cold rushing waters of the river... beats any man-made jacuzzi.... and the weather was just perfect even tho it was mid-day, the clouds provided nice shade. Only ting missing was the eggs, we could have had some hard boiled on the spot, if only we had brot them... but then, none of us anticipated a hot springs adventure anyway!
By the time we had enuf of hot/cold waters, our stomachs were ready to receive solids... so since we were near Ipoh, Ipoh it was... this time Ms GPS failed us; but there's always friendly human GPSs at petrol stations to direct us to the famous eating places in Ipoh town. Unfortunately by the time we ronda here and there, it was past lunch time 2 pm. These Ipoh-ites not like KL-ites, got food anytime of the day. At 2 pm, most of the shops tutup already. Still there was enuf to fill empty stomachs... the irony of it is my boy ended up taking Pg asam laksa in Ipoh!!Since we were in no hurry, we turned off at Bkt Merah Laketown to look-see look-see before rolling onto Penang. Nothing impressive, except gawking at ducks on the water!
Finally arriving in Pg late evening, we checked into the hotel. Come dinner time, the rain put a damper on our plans to blitz the open-air hawker-food stalls. So we had to be content to drive out to a nearby mall, and after going round and round in circles arguing over what to eat, instead of good ole Penang food, we had to settle for .... of all things.. Manhattan Fishmarket. Imagine, going all the way to Pg to eat Western food, which can be got in KL... bleh. Not that the fish-meal wasn't good; it was. But as i kept grumbling... I wanted PENANG food! Then it was a drive about at nite downtown... its been so long since i was in Penang; but the memories of my early childhood remained, and so i turned tourist guide for the kids, entertaining (or rather boring) them with grandma stories...
Next morning i insisted rain or no rain, we would hv Pg food..so finally at Pulau Tikus market, i got to indulge in chee cheong fun, assam laksa, char koay teow, curry mee, thick kopi-tiam coffee, etc etc. Quite happy, we decided to take a trip up to Pg Hill, since the kids had never been, and the last time i went was like... gee, umpteen umpteen years ago. So behaving like typical tourists lugging cameras in hand, we went up, gulped some fresh mountain air, ooh and ahh-ed over the views from the top, and came down satisfied we had done 'something' in Pg. Of coz no trip to Pg would be complete w/out a stop-over at Lorong Selamat for food (wat else!!)...more hokkien mee, char koay teow, rojak, ice kacang, to fill the stomach... Final stop was shopping, since we had promised the kids... not that there was much to shop at Bayan Baru centre. So by the time we hit the home road, it was late afternoon. Near dinner time Ms GPS directed us to clay pot chicken rice in Bidor. It wasn't great, but it filled the need. We ordered noodles - ying yeong - expecting the normal KL Cantonese version of wet hor fun. Instead turned out Bidor version consisted of totally different and opposite variety - dry fried mee hoon/ mee. Lesson of the day: Don't assume all things called by 1 name are the same 1 kind!
So ended the great adventure which should have been in Manado, but happened in Pg instead. Considering that this was the 2nd flight re-schedule, we choose to believe we were just not meant to go to Manado - who knows, there are enuf real-life stories out there that sometimes delays, cancellations, changes are forced on us for very good reason, even tho we can't see it then. I rmbr tales of survivors of disasters telling how they were saved becoz of a last minute change of plan. Well, in any case, God more than made up with an unexpectedly nice and easy trip for the family, so we are indeed much blessed...

" And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose "... Romans 8:28

Log into http://picasaweb.google.com/laisaikhoon for peep into the great adventure!

As baby birds grow...

 

My eldest princess turned 23 today. Over the w/end we had a family dinner to celebrate together with fave uncle (he's fave, becoz he always foots the bill, ha ha) and boyfren. I hv trouble keeping tabs on how old the kids get every b-day that rolls along(that shows how old i am!!). Slightly ashamed to say i still haven't gotten her a present - i left it to no. 2 princess, since she's the shopaholic in the family. But the prob with shopaholics is they never make up their minds!! Anyway, no. 1 is gracious; she knows she is much loved, with or without a present, and not just on her b-day.
She threw me a bomber the other day; she's not really 'into' her current job; and that's less than a year's work put in only. Her passion is writing and she wants to do it full-time. I can't help but think how my genes have rubbed off on her; i m still dreaming that dream after donkey years... here she is, at 23, actually tinking of living it. I shake my head at youth's restlessness and gung-ho.I dunno if she's tinking she's gonna be the next JK Rowling or watshisname who wrote Da Vinci Code...but I guess at 23, anything and everything seems good to try out; the world is your oyster, as the saying goes.
But i, looking from the vantage point of 50, see all sorts of road-blocks. Still i dont have the heart to be a wet blanket to remind her of the practical difficulties of such a choice , esp when i myself am not sure at this stage wat to make out of it. Besides if it's really God's will for her life to launch out into a different road, i don't wanna stand in the way. I've seen this 'kid' grow into a confident young woman thru 23 years. In my mind's eye, i recall those scenes on TV how a mother bird by instinct knows when to push the baby birds out of their nest after a while. I used to shudder at the images of little balls of feathers falling out, wobbling on their feet, flexing teeny wings trying to get lift-off; and there is the apparently unconcerned mother bird, just watching from the sidelines. And i fall to musing, I should be more like a mother-bird; otherwise my babies will never learn to fly.

Yet i harbour a human mother's natural concern for her child's well-being; how will she survive if she doesn't hold a full-time job, wat about her plans to get married, esp since the boy also aint interested in a 'regular' job but is tinking of going into full-time church ministry... gee, how will they set up family like this lah ?! All the how's, and no answers.
But at least i am consoled by her declaration that she wants to use the talent God has blessed her with according to His way. So i shld be happy she won't be writing her stuff, but His stuff - that's already a prayer answered to thank God for. And i guess 23 is as good a time to start living out a dream as any age, so long as it's of God, His time is always the perfect time.
So against all natural fleshly inclinations to whack some good old cow (i mean mother)-sense into her head and to keep her 'safe' in a cozy secure job (nest) , i shut up; and go down on my knees once again... to pray God's will be revealed and done in her life; that He will show her the how's and the where's...
Hrrmph, guess this mother will just go back to doing what she knows best to do... pray, trusting in God's Word....

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.... Jer 29:11

When the storms come..

The past month has been heart-rending. 4 cancer cases. It started with one of my church sisters, very active lady, always reaching out to share her faith; we were all shocked when told it had spread into her spine, lungs, and most of her organs at stage 3. After that in quick succession, 3 cases from within my own kindy; 2 of our staff's family members - a husband was diagnosed with lymphatic cancer,and the other a relapse of daughter's leukemia, even after a successful bone marrow transplant and last week, 1 of our very own staff had a breast removed. We pray constantly for them, for healing and that their faith not only remains steady, but will be strengthened even in such difficult to understand circumstances.

Its times like these that make people question the existence of God. If there is a God, He must be good, if He is good, why does He let such lousy tings happen to 'good' people?? And wats so great about this God they call Jesus?? ... see, Christians also suffer the same things other people suffer, Christians also get cancer, they also die wat. Yeah, sure they hold these great healing encounters now and then, and yeah, sure, there miracles of people who get cured, but wat about those who don't?? Wats the big deal about Jesus??

I guess it all depends on what you tink God is there for. If like most, you only want a God who caters to your every whim, fancy and wish, i m afraid Jesus is bound to disappoint. Problem is we tink God 'owes' us - that if we worship Him, He is supposed to give us health, wealth, prosperity and happiness in our lives. So when He doesn't, we shrug and say, heck, i dont wanna God who can't gimme a forever happy life without any problems. But the truth is God doesn't owe us a single thing, we owe Him everything...from each breath that we are breathing now, right down to the tiniest cell in our body. It's all by His grace that we are alive this moment in time. So, big deal? No, being alive is no big deal really, unless you recognize how big a deal it is being dead instead.

That's why we are a big deal to God, becoz He sees how dead in sin many of us really are tho our bodies are alive breathing. That's why His priority is not our physical self; unlike us, He doesn't bother how many white hairs or wrinkles we get, He's doesn't care how much money we have in our bank a/cs, how many degrees we have to our name. Doesn't He care about about our problems? Coz He does, He sees them all; the tears, grief, suffering, anger, despair...in fact He's known it all; when Jesus walked on earth as a man, He went thru all that Himself. Of coz He cares that we hurt, we are struggling, but He's more interested in getting our spirit right with and alive in Him. Becoz even if our body is being wrecked with cancer, even when our world is in a mess, so long as our spirit believes Jesus is the Way, the Life and the Truth, tho we may be crying our hearts out as our boat gets caught up in the storms of this earthly existence, He commands the winds and the waves to be still; He calls fearful hearts to rest in Him who is the Prince of Peace. He who created the heavens and the earth comes with a grand promise; that those who believe in Him shall never perish but have eternal life.

That's the big deal about Jesus. He's bigger than cancer, bigger than tsunamis, bigger than any and all the giants in our lives that we call 'problems'. No, Christians are not exempt from suffering; the only special thing is we have a very real, very beeg God who walks with us thru every trial and leads us all the way to heaven, such that even thru the valley of the shadow of death, we shall not fear. Becoz after all we go thru on earth, we know we shall stand in the presence of God Himself, secure in our heavenly home that is guaranteed to those who would just believe. When we live everyday with the reality of that kind of hope, nothing, absolutely nothing in this world can take us down.

"The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want..." Psalm 23