When God doesn't "Work"

A series of domestic appliances breaking down over the past few weeks was most trying on my nerves. First the robot vacuum jammed up. Then the electric steamer 'died'. The new replacement leaked the very first time I used it.  So did the toilet which was already not working properly, 'flooding' the floor every time it flushed. Followed by repairs to both my son's and my own car which dented my pockets some more. To top it all off, my  hand-me-down made in China Blackberry phone got a bit more 'wonky' after I dropped it on the floor, and I found myself hollering hallo's at people who called me; they could hear me perfectly but at my end, there was only dead silence. (Maybe that's a good thing)

So many things breaking down got me thinking. These days, when things don't work, we simply change,  throw away, get new ones. Heck, even if there's nothing wrong with a perfectly well-functioning phone, some of us would still queue overnight to get our hands on the latest smartie upgrade. Unfortunately this phenomenon of discard isn't confined to things. We shake our heads reading cases of babies being abandoned and old parents dropped off at homes or left behind in hospital wards. Do we wonder since when have human beings become 'things' that can be simply discarded, whenever they become too boring, too inconvenient, too old, too sick, too.. whatever. So it no longer shocks me that even in the public arena, assemblymen and MBs can "get changed" in power-plays that's, well, "just politics".

In private, when marriages sail into storms after the kids/inlaws/problems come, when all the sweet lovey-dovey courtship days are forgotten, it's a toss of the coin who mentions the "D" (divorce) word first. A relationship meant to last 'for better or for worse, till death do us part' degenerates into 'easy-come, easy-go', as simple as chucking out clothes we no longer like after 3 months, 3 years or 30 years (depending on your tolerance level). I don't mean to be flippant about such a serious subject, neither am I under-estimating the complexities of human relationships; after all, I am sure no one enters into a marriage with half-an-eye to a divorce - or do we nowadays?? Could it be that somewhere along the line of so-called progress, we have been so conditioned to assume that everything is just about making 'me' happy, so when "I" am not happy for whatever reason, we automatically look around for alternative and seemingly easier options? I could be wrong, indeed I hope I am, as I only have my own limited experiences to talk about. .

A long time ago, I nearly threw away my marriage; I was pregnant with my second child then. Stressed out from a lot of things and ill from a difficult pregnancy, I was all too ready to throw in the towel on a relationship that had seen better days. I dropped the 'D' word first, and told my husband to talk to my lawyer; who was actually our mutual friend. He didn't try to talk me out of it but my lawyer did (that's what real friends are for, I guess). He just moped, and I moped too. He had said sorry, what else could he do. What else did I expect him to do? Well, for one, I expected him to change; after all he had said sorry once, he shouldn't do 'it' again, but he did, so how can I ever trust such a man? What's the point of carrying on a relationship that hurts me? Then I realized yes, there would always be a risk of getting hurt again, but my love was bigger than his betrayal. I wasn't a Christian then, but I knew I could choose to forgive the wrong, even if I couldn't forget the pain. Even if he didn't deserve another chance, I did, my kids did, my marriage did. So we stayed married, and needless to add, we went through some more ups and downs until his death indeed did we part. Was it worth it? At the time of the pain, certainly not. Still looking back, I am glad I didn't walk away from my marriage, even when it didn't seem to be working.

Taking it to another level, if this is mankind's common reaction whenever something doesn't 'work', I guess it's no surprise that we treat God the same way when He doesn't 'work'. If we can choose to turn our back on what used to be considered a sacred covenantal love-relationship with another human being - a spouse, a parent, a child - whom we can see, hear and touch, how much easier it is to give up on a God we don't see. And that is precisely what Apostle John said, "For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen" (1 John 4:20)

Thus when God doesn't act according to how we want or expect Him to, we say well, there it is, I tried God, but He doesn't work; so why should I believe He even exists? Besides, even if He did, I don't need a God who doesn't satisfy me, make me feel good or answer my questions. So He can go His way and I will go mine; let's just 'divorce'. Life may indeed seem to be much easier (and probably more fun) that way, but would it be worth it? If I had thrown my marriage away, would I have had a 'better' life being 'free' of the love which was no longer what it used to be or what I thought it should be? One thing for sure, if I had done that, both of us would have been the poorer, without our one and only son being born to us. On the other hand, I may probably have been spared the pain of being widowed so early in life. But then again I would never have known the comfort of a God who walks with me even 'through the valley of the shadow of death' otherwise. Well, perhaps I would have married again and found happiness elsewhere?

Actually hard as the journey of our marriage has been, both of us obtained something we never were looking for in the first place. We found God and the highest blessing - our souls' salvation - in the process. That's truly a priceless gain; at which point I realized happiness is so over-rated. A life worth living doesn't depend on 'me' being satisfied; it isn't something to be 'found' in things, people,circumstances or ourselves. As far as my experience goes at least, self-actualization is not the highest end all and be all of our human existence. More than mere fleeting happiness, there is a higher station called joy which can only come from knowing and trusting a God whose love never fails and is forever (unlike the love of man),  even and especially when He doesn't 'work'. When Jesus hung limp and dying on a cross, at a time when He seemed totally incapacitated to do anything for Himself, much less for anyone else, actually He was 'working' like crazy for mankind's salvation. When everything seemed to be going all wrong, that was the time everything was actually going all right, according to God's book.

So when I look at what's happening in the world around me, and I am inclined to moan and groan, complain and get angry or frustrated, I remember there is Someone more powerful than kings, governments and politicians who sees all, knows all and has everything under control, even if it really doesn't seem that way. When I am apt to think He's not doing His job or is doing a lousy job, I remember the words of the apostle James, "Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes" (James 4:14) Howzat for a reality check?


Indeed the psalmist asks, "Why do the nations conspire and the peoples plot in vain? The kings of the earth rise up and the rulers band together against the Lord and against His anointed.... The One enthroned in heaven laughs; the Lord scoffs at them..." (Psalm 2:1-4). I don't think that means God finds our human foibles funny or contemptible. I think it just means the Creator of the universe doesn't get uptight, so I shouldn't too. On the contrary Jesus wept when He considered the lost estate of mankind. So why doesn't God act in the face of all the suffering, wickedness, injustice, corruption and downright evil that's going on around us? That's just it; He did. He sent Jesus. The problem is we don't see that as a solution at all; since we are apt to consider Jesus as another religious crutch for the weak and gullible, the so-called 'opiate of the masses' that turns believers into mindless fanatics who only know how to rant about sin, judgement and hell.

Well, yes, I do rant about sin, judgement and hell, but that's because it's the truth anyway, no matter how unpalatable all that is. But far from being mindless, I am very mindful of the state of this planet called earth that I inhabit. And it pains me as I am sure it pains God to see how humanity messes up. To the extent that I can, I do my part as a responsible citizen of my country and the world that I live in. But how can broken man fix a broken world? We can't save ourselves. That's why the world needs a Savior; not politics, social activism or religion. Simplistic? Naive?

Well, we can chuck out all sorts of stuff, we can even chuck out people from our lives. But chucking out God just because we think He doesn't 'work' - now that's simplistic. I took a chance on my marriage. I'll take my chance on God; He's greater than my heart. Unlike man, He's never failed me, He's definitely worth taking a risk on. Like good old prophet Job declared " Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him" - Job 13:15

"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. Instead He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance....But in keeping with His promise we are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth, where righteousness dwells" - 2 Peter 3:8-9, 13

When the Music Stops

Another day's work done. Or so I thought, as I walked out of the street alley. I had hoped to see Mr Saddest Face, the guy to whom I had given my ang-pow last week. But he wasn't around. That's how it is on the streets; many times, I never know what happens to the people I talk to, share with and pray for every Sat. There are some I only see once, and then they disappear from my life. Which is why I deem it so so crucial to let everyone I talk to know about Jesus. I leave them with that Name above every other name, in the hope that even though they may literally drop out of my life after 1 chance meeting, who knows someday when they are pushed to the wall, have lost all hope and don't know what to do or where else to run, mayhap, they will remember and they will call that Name, and be saved....

There are some though who re-appear after a long absence. Like this young couple with kid daughter in tow; she tells me the husband has lost his job, again. This time they brought her sister-in-law along who has not 1, but 2 kids - a baby in her arms, and another little boy, barely 3 years old at most. My heart groans inwardly. Bad enuf the adults are in this state...even kids are not spared the indignity.... But kids being just kids, they are oblivious to their surroundings or their condition. So there they go, the girl is busy wolfing down a free bun, the boy is fascinated with the guys who have started off the day's programme with a catchy tune.  He is clapping his little hands and it's then I realize today's singing is different.

The old song was one familiar to all on the street, yet it sounded so....new. It 'got' to my heart, and set my hands tingling and feet tapping. I know anointed worship when I hear it. And this was anointed stuff; I paid closer attention to the young man leading; he was a 'newbie', apparently 'saved' straight out of the street. What a testimony to the power of God who alone can lift people out of the deepest darkest holes of human degradation and put us back into rightful relationship Him and with society, and give us new songs to sing to celebrate life. Looking at him belting his soul out, I knew this was how it should be, not just a 15 min sing-song session but a time to connect man's heart with God's heart. We can preach the best-sounding sermons, but it's anointed worship that brings God's very presence into our midst, and creates that spiritual climate that will move human hearts to respond. Everything gets charged up when God envelops human space.

And the effects linger on.....my eyes swept through the crowd of faces and connected to the 2 guys sitting together. One was an old-timer, the other comes by occasionally. I  passed them with an off-hand remark to the one I know - that he can run away from man but he can never run from God because God loves him. Sometimes words just come to me, but I have learnt somehow God uses my mouth to speak to human hearts. Now 1 hour later, the 2 of them were lounging aimlessly on an unused cart outside. The alley was almost empty, apart from the drug rehab centre boys who, as usual, were staying back to dismantle the support posts that provided cover for our afternoon feeding.

Again the prompting came to talk to my fren, though I really just wanted to go home as I was tired. He was eyeing me warily as I walked up to them. "So where are you running to, now?" He looked ashamed. "Nowhere la, aunty. I wanna go home Puchong, I got no money, just come out hospital.." Man, this guy can tell stories. "Walk la" was my reply. We all laughed. Then he sobered up as he confessed he had fallen back into old habits and he didn't know how to carry on anymore; he had given up on himself. Once again, I felt my own helplessness in the face of his hopelessness. So once again, I did the only thing I can do; remind him there is a God who loves him, who can turn his life around if he would only believe and act on that belief. It's always been that way; belief is only 1 side of the coin. God doesn't save us to allow us to go on sinning and living the old life. If we do, we will just fall again, and again and again. But the good news is He will pick us up again, and again and again. Till we get it into our thick fat heads it's His responsibility to save, but our responsibility to change as He empowers us to change. Jesus always healed and almost always after that,  left a word to whoever He healed..."Go, sin no more"

Suddenly the other guy piped up. "Aunty, I wanna go into centre... I need help...I don't wanna live like this any longer..I see Jesus in front of me every morning.. " Finally a heart crying out, admitting its need, and willing to do his part. It reminded me of a Christian book titled, "If you don't step out of the boat, you can't walk on water " based on Peter, the disciple, probably the only human being who ever walked on water in a storm-tossed sea (at least for a few minutes), because he dared to when Jesus called him forth. It's taken this guy a long time but thank God, today, he was ready to step out of his boat. As I prayed for him, my heart was singing. I told him, as much for my own benefit as it was for theirs, "Our eyes only see, and sometimes all we see is bad, but when we know Jesus, our hearts just know different." The young man nods his head, flashes a big grin and waves as I walk off.

Statistics apparently show for every 3 addicts who go into rehab, 2 will relapse. It's such a vicious cycle. If I were a little less trusting of God, I would long have given up praying for these fellas...people who disappear and re-appear with the same problems, people who have been sitting on the stools every Saturday for the past 10 years getting free food (and apparently precious little else despite all the sermons sounding in their ears), people still unchanged in spite of all the prayers going up to heaven for them. Many times my human eyes fail to see the point of  all our blood, sweat and tears poured into this ministry. But my heart tells me something else; that God is at work all the time, unseen. That even after the music stops, even when all has been said and done, He is still working....even when we give up, God doesn't give up...even when all  I want to do is go home. I am glad I didn't.

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal" - 2 Corinthians 4:18

A Different Gift for a Different Heart

 He had the saddest face, which was what drew me to him as I cast my eye over the Saturday afternoon crowd who were waiting as usual for us to get on with the feeding. His story was nothing unusual in itself. It's one that I have grown familiar with, serving on the streets...another drug junkie, ex jailbird, runaway from home...what else is new. I know I can't help any one of them, but like I said, he had the saddest face.
So after he spoke of a mother he had not seen in years,  I decided to tell him some stories of my own. I told him of a day when there was nothing, and then God created everything. I took him back to Eden when God breathed His own breath into a lump of clay to create a most beautiful being in His own image , named him Adam ( derived from the Hebrew word for 'red' - the color of the earth from which he was made), gifted him with a most beautiful wo-man, and set them together for a most beautiful purpose; that they shall have dominion over all the earth. Of coz  I had to tell him the sad story of how man messed up God's noble intent when he decided to go his own way, disobeying God's commandment not to eat of the (1 miserable) forbidden fruit, which consequence was the downfall of humankind throughout the ages, afflicting succeeding generations (as we are now) with a natural inherited inclination to sin.  Then I told him the happy ending about the prodigal son whose sins were all forgotten by a loving father who had spent his days waiting to welcome him home. But before I could say more, I was called up to start the afternoon programme, which was rather special, because today it wasn't just the usual curry rice, teh tarik and bread.

Today everyone was eyeing the lorry that had drawn up into the alley grounds packed to the brim with hampers. Everybody was expecting a wind-fall, and thanks to a very generous donor, indeed everyone got one. But Mr. Saddest Face was different. He didn't seem interested in the freebies. That alone set him apart from the rest. Somewhere along the line, he had moved up from where I had left him earlier, and now he was sitting right by the speakers.  I finished my job, sat down beside him and asked him what he really wanted. He looked down at his hands and said very softly, 'I want to live'. And he started talking about having sinned against his mother. Amazing, he had connected straightaway with the parable of the prodigal son I had told him earlier. And of coz, that was my cue to tell him the final - the greatest - love story of Jesus Christ, who had come to take away all our sin,  to give life, abundant and everlasting, to all who would believe. By the time I finished praying with and for him, they were distributing the hampers and a very big ang-pow of $20. Even I got one. But my sad fren didn't even bother to open his ang-pow, he just let it lie loosely in his open palm and he tried to give mine back when I pressed it into his hand. Others would have grabbed the extra packet straight away. I told him to use the money to go home and say sorry to his mother. For good measure I warned him if he misused the money on drugs again,  he would have to answer to God Himself. He shook his head vehemently and looked like he was going to cry.

Half my mind was thinking I must be crazy to give him some more money. He had just confessed he had his last fix this morning. But against my own rationale and better judgment, I had obeyed the inner voice that had suddenly told me to give it to him. God knows these people are perfectly capable of telling such affecting  sob-stories and weeping oh-so-real crocodile tears that would bleed a heart more tender than mine. In all probability I will never know how he used the money literally dropped into his lap. Heck, in fact, I may never see him again. But this was one of those very rare occasions I had been stirred to give;  I guess God honors a genuinely repentant heart straight away, unlike cynical old me. Will it last or is it just temporary guilt induced by a story which cut too close into his conscience?

I don't know. But that's not for me to worry about. I have done what I should and can do - brought a fellow human being to face the ugly truth about sin and the beauty of a compassionate merciful God, whose love and forgiveness could never be doubted, displayed as it was for all mankind, when Jesus stretched out His hands to be nailed to the cross. As I ended the story with the resurrection of Jesus Christ from death, I told my sad brother, he now has a reason to celebrate - because Jesus lives, he too can live in victory, because he chose to believe, for him, there's hope of a better tomorrow;  the certainty of sins forgiven and the freedom of being made over into a new creation. He got what his heart wanted and needed after all. And the gift didn't come in a hamper or an ang-pow packet. It came in a Savior.

"He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world" - 1 John 2:2

A Different Kind of Beautiful

Beautiful is such a complex word.  What's the first thing that pops into your head if you were asked what's beautiful? Most people, I venture, would think of nature or things. The grandeur of sun rise...sun set...expansive scenery...animal antics...fabulous ball-gowns...the pattern of a cup of coffee latte...the little-ness of a new-born babe. Or maybe we think beautiful is about people most comely in terms of physical appearances - sculptured looks...shapely, well-toned bodies to die for. We could also admire certain traits as beautiful...charm, gentleness, humility, generosity. 

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Yet the longer I live, the more I learn the truth of what Helen Keller said, "The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched; they must be felt with the heart". I count as beautiful the way my husband used to call me "Ling"; it's a common enough shortened 'pet' term of endearment for darling, but what made it beautiful was the way he used it in a tone only he could use it. Beautiful is reading the Bible and getting hit with another new (tho often painful) way of looking at myself, at life and at God. A beautiful moment happened when the gardener came round at my request even though it was still drizzling slightly, not just to cut the grass but to leave me a bunch of rambutans - a totally unexpected gift from a foreigner who uses a bicycle and a portable grass-cutter to eke out a living.

Beautiful is this story told by a 'druggie' just released from prison, of a day he never forgot as he was standing at the edge of a building ready to kill himself. In desperation and anger, he started railing at God and daring Him to send rain if He really cared about his miserable life. And God answered 3x - first there was the rumble of thunder, despite it being a very hot, very bright day. The man wasn't satisfied, he told God he had asked for rain - 1 drop of water plopped onto his arm. But he still wasn't satisfied; he had the gumption to shake his fist at heaven and tell God (again)  it must be 'real' rain or nothing else. Suddenly the sky grew dark, and as clouds obliterated the sun,  the rain fell -  huge heavy drops that drove him back off from the edge and finally accept there is a God who loves him, who is giving him a second chance. Beautiful also is watching an ex-drug addict hold an umbrella over an old uncle limping on his walker into the street alley in a thunderstorm.

But as much as there is beautiful, there is also ugly; like Beauty and the beast. Ugly is the yucky cockroach running across the kitchen floor, it is the stinky rubbish dump I have to pass every Saturday to get to the street alley where we feed the homeless, poor and marginalized, folks whom "normal" society deems  ugly because...they have weird tattoos on their arms and sores on their bodies, they blow smoke and cough probably contagious  germs into your face , they smell of alcohol, they are obviously lazy, good-for-nothing 'rejects' of society who don't deserve any charity or sympathy really. Ugly is the practice and condoning of  evil, injustice, corruption, hypocrisy, racism and all things repugnant to equality, righteousness and truth.

But there are more insidous forms of ugly....  It is  being blind to the fact that mankind's worst enemy can be the face staring at us in the mirror every morning. Ugly is mistaking religion for a relationship with Jesus. Ugly is using, mis-using and abusing God instead of worshipping Him. Ugly is the deception that says man can live without accounting to his Maker. Ugly is the sin that keeps us from experiencing the fullness of life we were all created to enjoy forever. Ugly is the eternal death that separates man from God.

Which is why Jesus Christ who came to bring reconciliation between man and man and man and God  is called Beautiful Savior. Yet contrary to popular portrayals of Jesus on book-covers and in films, He isn't that stoically broodingly handsome young man, with long flowing hair, blue eyes and winsome smile, serenely clutching a little lamb with a shepherd's staff in hand. Actually "He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to Him, nothing in His appearance that we should desire Him. He was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain. Like one from whom people hide their faces He was despised, and we held Him in low esteem" (Isaiah 53:1-2)..Wait a minute, that's ugly, not beautiful.

I am sure Jesus didn't look beautiful when He got so angry He drove out business-minded merchants who were making God's house "a den of robbers". He could have cooked all those religious crooks with a zap of lightning, but He didn't, He used a whip fashioned out of His own human hands. How could Jesus be beautiful after fasting 40 days and nites without water and food in the desert? He could have turned stones into bread for Himself; He didn't, but He did it for some 15000 people over 2 occassions. What beauty is there in an exhausted Jesus, collapsed sleeping in a storm-tossed boat, so worn-out with healing the sick, exorcising demons, raising the dead and performing miracles as if it was His daily occupation (which it was for 3 years), traipsing all over villages and towns on foot? He could have grown wings, but He chose to walk on 2 human feet. There is no beauty in a sweating Jesus, agonizing in solitary prayer; His "soul..overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death." He could have commanded legions of angels to His rescue but He struggled alone whilst His disciples slept.  Surely there is nothing beautiful about a naked man, wild-eyed and bleeding, the flesh on His back torn and hanging in strips after 39 lashes, stumbling to carry a 200 lb cross up a hill. We are so used to the idea of a 'sanitized', serene, saintly Jesus with a halo round His head . Yet in reality, He got hungry, weary and angry (tho always only at the right things). He celebrated weddings, wept at funerals. As human as human can be,  with 1 crucial distinction that sets Him apart as truly beautiful; as the "one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet He did not sin (Hebrews 4:16), for "in Him was no sin" (1 John 3:5)

Still, surely it's a misnomer to call Him Savior? What a joke - He wants to save the world when He can't even save Himself. The challenge thrown at Jesus 2000 years ago as He hung dying, suspended between heaven and earth,  "Let him come down now from the cross, and we will believe in him" (Matthew 27:42) is still being shouted out today in similar terms - Let God prove, do, show (whatever).....then I will believe. Yet, even if God did whatever we wanted Him to do, actually in truth, some of us would still never be satisfied with God enough to believe. It's just like the ex-con who shared the story above, here is a guy who has experienced the very visible intervention of God  - an exact answer to an exact demand at precisely the exact moment - but today he is still not sure about committing to the God who loves him. When I asked him why, he shrugged his shoulders and said, "I know I should, aunty, but I can't, maybe I am afraid...maybe I still can't let go of myself" At least this man's honest and knows he really has no excuse. He recognizes believing starts with letting go of 'my' self, 'my' perception, assumption and presumption of who/what I think God is or should be or must do, and allowing Him to work in my life,  His way His time. When I did that 11 years ago, I discovered some marvelous truths...

..That the ugliest thing -death - was meted out on the cross of Calvary, when Jesus, the perfect Love,  was crucified. But the good news is that He who was crowned with thorns now bestows upon every believer "a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair" (Isaiah 61:3). And the most beautiful thing was an empty tomb,  for death couldn't hold Jesus down, the resurrected Christ is God's beautiful plan for mankind's salvation, making Him indeed the most Beautiful - perfect Man, perfect God - a different kind of beautiful.


I delight greatly in the Lord; my soul rejoices in my God. For He has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of His righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels. (Isaiah 61:10)
  

The Cost of a Freebie

What is it about freebies that bring out the worst in man? We all know the stories of people piling up plates with food at open-house buffet lines. Or the mad scramble for cutesy toys which come with certain (happy) meals. I guess if so-called perfectly civilized people can turn barbaric in a moment, what more 'unsavoury' suspicious characters who roam aimlessly on the streets - beggars, drug addicts, prostitutes, drunkards and homeless vagabonds. So I really shouldn't be surprised that come Christmas or any festival, we see a sudden increase in our Saturday street-feeding sessions, because everyone expects goody-bags to be given out as a matter of course. 
Some will surreptitiously try to hide their first plate of rice in a plastic bag and go for seconds. Others have no qualms putting out their hands for an extra goody-bag.  Because of the greed of some, others are deprived. So it was the Saturday before Christmas; it had started out so well, with Christmas carols belted out by a group of volunteers. Then a brief sharing of the real meaning of Christmas, not being about Santa Claus giving out presents but about Jesus Christ who was, and is and ever will be the best present from God. Then as the crowd swelled with people coming in after the sharing, the free food and towels ran out. And that's when the real human nature reared its ugly head. There were complaints of this, that and the other. Forgotten was the good news of Jesus coming to save the world. 

How easily and quickly man gets distracted and forget the real point. Like someone said we tend to major on the minors of life. We can get so caught up over all the freebies trotted out by man, we ignore altogether the greatest free gift from God. It's like little kids going all agog over the presents at the bottom of the Christmas tree, totally unaware and oblivious that the best gift from mummy/daddy is actually their hearts' love, unseen and priceless. I dare say every human parent wants the best for their off-spring and have no greater desire than that their kids simply love them back . At least that's my understanding of parenthood. Translate that into a higher level, and surely its not hard to understand God's intent is to give us the best-est in His infinite wisdom, and His desire is simply to have us love Him back because He first loved us. The problem is like all growing and grown-up kids who never think that what our parents want for us is good, we are quite liable to disagree with God on this issue too. So whilst His idea is to mature us spiritually to experience the abundant eternal life that is beyond anything we can ever imagine, many just play hide-n-seek or runaway, and much prefer building our own castles in the sand of mortal life.

Oh, some of us will condescend to pay God some form of lip-service. So we will have lots of people believing all gods are the same, all roads lead to heaven anyway, whatever you feel is good for you will do, god is ok with that. That's also how we can have churches packed to the brim, even overflowing, on 3 days in a year ie for Good Friday, Easter and Christmas, but half full (or half empty, depending on whether you are an optimist or a pessimist) on the rest of the 'normal' Sundays, and I dare say, even less at prayer meetings. Worse, some Christians are seen in God's House only 3 times in their lives - on their  baptism, wedding and funeral day. If that's meant to be a joke, I am sure God isn't laughing. Imagine the feelings of a parent being treated that way by his/her kids (which apparently is not that uncommon a practice in today's society). 

Not to mention we could be regularly attending church for all sorts of reasons - 'cool' music, inspiring preaching, relevant insights, wonderful fellowship, great 'feel-good' vibes, magnificent building (which we sacrificially paid for and so consider ourselves 'entitled' to book our fave seat there) - and fool ourselves in thinking we surely must be doing ok with God. Really, truly? Hmmm, if my kids only came back home for the great food I cook (actually quite the opposite),  the comfy bed or house, free laundry-service, or to enjoy the companionship of siblings (which is sometimes more like mutual toleration in fact), I would be a very sad mum indeed, even if they could and do dutifully 'pay' me out of their earnings. Lest I be accused of being judgmental, I am just stating obvious and observable facts. After all, everyone, Christians and non-Christians can talk a lot and do a lot of 'good' and 'right' things, and still get it all wrong with God. 

Perhaps we take Jesus so lightly because we hear the good news touted so often that salvation is a free gift. A gift can be treasured or can be chucked aside anytime, since it costs us nothing. I have received many gifts in my life, and whilst I am appropriately grateful, I have to admit some gifts I have donated away because honestly I don't need/find any use for them. Likewise, some people find they have no use or need for God...so thanks but no thanks, God, You go your way, I go mine; we owe each other nothing. Others treat God like a gift we can tuck away in 1 corner of our heart's store and pull it out on the days we feel like it. Or maybe we regularly polish it up and place it in the most prominent corner of our living-room to 'show off' to visitors to check out, and when the visitors go off, we pack it back into the box. But we have never taken it up into the privacy of our own bed-room to admire and fuss over it ourselves (where got time for that); besides bed-rooms are off-limits to everyone (even or especially God). Neither would we go to the extent of carrying it around everywhere with us (that's way too much bother). Amazing the ways we can treat a gift or God. 

The goody-bags we give out  free to the 'street-ites' during festivals cost something to those who bought and packed them. Every gift comes with a price tag actually, even if it's given free to the recipient. A story goes that when Jesus asked the devil who was waiting to drag a dying man to hell, "How much for the soul of this human?" and the devil answered, "A life for a life, Your life for this human's ", Jesus replied, "Done", and died on the cross. A business news article tried to calculate the worth of a 'soul', using a diverse variety of 'measurements', from such things as the price of gold, employment income, value of statistical life, world GDP down to the comic Homer Simpson's exchange of his soul for a donut,  "ignoring the extreme cases of $1.00 and $16.6 trillion, we have four examples where the soul was evaluated at $540,600, $1,745,926, $241,789 and $8,600,000 in 2013 dollars.... the average here is $2.8 million for a soul". (Currency is US$) Man, we are that cheap? But hang on, if we ask our Creator, how much are we worth to You, God? Jesus answered, "What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?" (Mark 8:36)

So how much is the 'whole world' worth? Well, I don't know if we can even estimate the cost of all the physical stuff alone that makes up the world's 'worth' - mountains, forests, sunrise, sunsets, flowers, wind,  clouds, rain, everything in the heavens, on earth and under the seas...it's really a moot point - our souls are simply priceless to God. Yet too often we are inclined to reduce the significance that it cost God a most precious Life to give us life. Not just any life, but the life of the pure, sinless and divine One from heaven. The cost Jesus paid to bear every human sin, to die on the cross and to go to hell on our behalf is uncountable and invaluable - that's how much we mean to God. 

So next time someone says, Salvation is free, it would be good to remember and appreciate the truth - Salvation is free for all only because SomeOne paid the price. The cost of this 'freebie' was the blood of Jesus Christ. And lest we are minded to throw the gift away because we never asked for it, may we also realize the reason why He did it for ungrateful, forgetful man, is because "This is love; not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent Jesus as an atoning sacrifice for our sins" (1 John 4:10). All other loves derive from this perfect and perfected Love. If we have not this Love, all other loves can never satisfy because they would be incomplete.

"This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment" - 1 John 4:17