Love Hurts

Gimme a four-letter word that means pain. L-O-V-E. What's the first image of LOVE that comes to your mind? That depends on where you are right now in the journey of life,I guess. Umpteen moons ago, love for me meant a heart-beat that shot thru the roof every time I spied the object - oops, i mean subject - of my then affection walk past my class in Form 6. Several years down the line, past the throes of puppy love, the day I signed on the dotted line of the marriage register, love took me into the life of another human being. And soon after, I beheld a new kind  of love in my arms when I gave birth to my first, second and then my third child.

I was raised on fairy tales of love, where the beautiful princess will always marry the handsome prince and live happily ever after. Where the kids are always obedient and never question the authority or wisdom of their parents. Where love goes along with fresh air, sunshine, dream vacations and all things nice. Well, that's the world of fairy-tales, I guess. But after half a century of living, the truth hits home; love ain't a fairy-tale, love certainly isn't the sugary hype of teary movies or soppy pop songs. Love wrenches the guts out, it strikes blows to the heart, flips the brains and punches the breath out. Love hurts. And sometimes it hurts real bad. There is a price to pay for love....

 I think of how many times my husband used to say sorry to patch up a quarrel between us, even when he wasn't wrong. He chose peace, instead of rights. It must have hurt him to love me that much. It was only much later subsequently that I myself understood Adam's declaration of love for the one who 'completed' him - bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh, when I watched my dearly beloved spouse die. Love hurts....

I bite my tongue watching the kids grow up and wander off into paths I know will trip them up. But love demands that I give them a choice to make their own decisions, even when i know they are wrong ones. The temptation to impose my will on those I love - for their own sake - keeps choking me up.
Which parent would stand idly by and let their beloved children get hurt? I remember those long ago days in the park,  how my husband would run after our little boy as he veered off on his bicycle for the first time without  training wheels. Sometimes he would run alongside with his hands desperately trying to control the handlebars for the son. They made such a comical picture. The kid would fall, of coz. And his Papa would be swiftly picking him up, dusting off the sand from scraped knees... How many times do parents have to 'run after' their kids who are testing out their 'bicycles' of life? Yet, there comes a time when we realise we are too old to run after them or  hold the handle-bars to steady them. Like it or not, we have to stand aside and watch them fall. And unlike the child who automatically comes running back into our arms, the all grown-up kid doesn't come back. She picks herself up and walks away from you, into her own private world of secrets. Yes, love hurts....

And I wonder at the the greatest love-story played out on a hill-top 2000 years ago....how it must have hurt Jesus to hang on a cross, suspended between heaven and earth, caught in the pain of an excruciating death by crucifixion.. Even more, how it must have hurt for Him to know that He would be misunderstood, mocked and rejected by a world that by and large, didn't (then) and still doesn't (now)care to receive Him. If I hurt so much over the people I love, how much God must grieve over us, His beloved creation, when our stubborn minds and closed hearts refuse to listen, believe and be saved. How much love hurts....


Man complicates life by dissecting religion, we demand reasons to believe. God simply loves...if His love cannot blow our minds and melt our hearts, nothing can.

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us"...Romans 5:8