Sent For A Reason

I have the haze and Putrajaya to thank for a day off, as they ordered a closure of all schools due to the unhealthy API readings in Selangor. So with time on my hands, I trooped off to immerse myself for 2 1/2 hours in the cold air-con and comfy seat of an almost empty cinema hall to ogle at Henry Cavill, strutting his stuff as the latest Superman -Man of Steel. Oh yes, minus the inside-out underwear, he was every bit a drop-dead handsome hunk, even tho I didn't like the almost perpetual frown on his face. The build-up to the climax was a slight bit draggy but I appreciated the effort to trace back Superman's 'roots' and the flash-back snapshots of his 2 sets of (fantastically wise) parents. As for the action, well, it was action enuf when it started flowing fast and furious towards the end, so much boom, boom, bang, bang mass and messy destruction.

But it was a little scene that stood out somewhat incongruously for a sci-fi movie that caught my attention most -  when, caught on the horns of a personal dilemma, since he can trust neither his own kind from the alien planet Krypton nor humans of the world he grew up in, Superman went to church. And as he walks away, the priest tells him point-blank, "Sometimes you have to take a leap of faith. Then the trust thing comes afterwards." Ha ha, talk about religious under-tones. What a classic statement. Nothing new to Christians of coz, our whole life is based on faith first and foremost. Jesus declared it in 2 words, "Just believe" (Luke 8:50) But that's the toughest call for humankind because we can't  'just' believe there is a God, much less a God who loves  us. We definitely can't 'just' believe Jesus Christ came, died and rose again to save our souls. It's the same old same old arguments regarding proof (or rather lack thereof), that so many people hold back from believing the good news of a Savior who did everything so that we could be reconciled with our fellow man and with God. So as long as there is no 'conclusive evidence' either way, people will not or cannot  'just believe'. The problem is there is no other evidence beyond what is already documented of an event that took place 2000 years ago. Again and again man is confronted by only 1 central issue - the resurrection of Jesus Christ. On that alone stands the whole basis of the Christian faith. Some people side-step the issue as irrelevant to them since they are not into 'religion'. But it's not about religion per se. Rather it's about confronting ourselves as we are confronted with Jesus Christ.

There was a scene in the movie where Superman's human father says, "You are my son. But somewhere out there you have another father, and he sent you here for a reason. And even if it takes you the rest of your life, you owe it to yourself to find out what that reason is." How true, we are born into this world for a reason, not just to eat, drink and be merry. Not just to do good and die.  My life  is not a mere 'flash in the pan' where I just breathe for maybe 70 years, then simply cease being  and get reduced to zilch - meaningless dust and ashes. That may be ok to others, but personally, I refuse to accept that as it renders me in essence to being no better than my cat. I believe I am more than a physical body made up of a mass of bones, tissues, nerves and blood. I have soul and spirit and the state and destination of my being matters an awful lot to me. Of coz there are people who don't care or don't believe there is any existence beyond this life on earth; that's their prerogative. But once we decide to believe our life has eternal meaning and significance, like Superman's human father said, we owe it to ourselves to find out the reason therefor.

It took me 40 years to find out that the reason for my living and being is tied up with Someone I have never ever seen nor known personally. Tied up in and by the greatest unseen force ever known  - love, and not just any love, but love beyond human comprehension. The more I try to understand it, the more I can only  stand in  awe of it. Sometimes I think we are so intent and insistent on getting answers to the what and how's of life, that we fail to appreciate the why's and wherefore's. Why do we 'fall in love'? Why do people die? Why can't we live forever? Why is there so much evil in the world? Why do some people suffer so much? Why is it God seems to contradict Himself sometimes? Why aren't all my prayers answered?  Why, Why, tell me why is the usual refrain of a little child. Yet  it really doesn't bother the kid much when you dare say 'Sweetie, I don't know, it just is.' The innocent kid can accept that, even if he may think you aren't very smart after all. It's (smart) adults who insist all the questions in the universe must be answered. So when there doesn't seem to be any or any satisfactory answer, some people just give up asking. But it's the 'why's'  that force us to seriously consider the things that really matter , and lead us to decide one way or another, how we want to live our lives. 

I  always thought I was smart until I tried to understand why a total stranger would apparently and simply sacrifice his life for me. My (smart) mind tells me there are 10,000 reasons (and more) why I shouldn't believe it. But overiding all these, my heart tells me there is 1 reason why I should, tho it makes no sense; in fact it appears to be sheer madness. Yet Shakespeare said "There is method in madness." Someone else also said, "Love that is not madness is not love." Quite apart from all the perfectly smart questions I can ask about the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, the most important one is not how, but why. Why was Jesus sent here? Why did He willingly let Himself be hung on a cross? Why would He die for such as I? My mind cannot conceive of any 'good' reason, but after so many years of getting to know Him, my heart can only conclude that Jesus came to prove a Love so mad, to offer a relationship (not a religion) with Him as the only method that makes me be and become all that I am meant to be. Without Him, I can only be 'that much' good but I can never be the best that my Creator 'wired' me up to be. Every living thing on this earth is bound up in relationship; whether it's nature vs man, man vs man or man vs God. We can deny, reject, misuse or abuse relationships,  but relationship is what gives meaning and significance to our lives.

I always assumed the letter "S" on Superman's suit was an acronym for his name, but it apparently isn't;  it means "Hope" in the Krypton world. Hope. A word pregnant with promise. One of the 3 great 'anchors' that Apostle Paul talks of - faith, hope and love (1 Corinthians 13:13). Not a hope that says "Well, I think maybe there is a chance...." but one that's grounded on love that has already been proven 2000 years ago via a deal hammered out on an ugly cross, sealed by and in the blood of Jesus Christ, in a totally incomprehensible exchange of His life for mine. That's the faith relationship, carved out of sacrificial love, built on an everlasting hope that has defeated the greatest enemy of mankind - death. Not some temporary spine-tingling emotional high or fancy sweet words, but (literally) a blood-soaked, heart-wrenching, gut-splitting reality that hits you in the face and demands a response. Why does He love me so? I don't know...because He just does. No simpler (or harder??)  faith, no higher hope, no greater love, no other method. 

Superman was sent to save the world from annihilation and become the symbol of hope for all mankind.  Yet he hid his real identity because his adoptive father warned that if the world found out who he really was, they'd reject him, convinced that the world wasn't ready to accept or believe in aliens from another planet living in their midst. Likewise Superman's real mother was concerned that her baby would grow up to be an outcast, a freak, and that humans would kill him for being different. 

So it was with Jesus. He was sent to save us; He is the hope of all mankind. But the world He came into  rejected Him, because they couldn't or didn't want to understand or believe. So humans killed him. As Apostle John put it, "He was in the world, and though the world was made through Him, the world did not recognize Him. He came to that which was His own, but His own did not receive him" (John 1:10-11). It's the same old same old story, carried over from 2000 years ago. As it was then, so it is now - Jesus Christ is still being blasphemed, misunderstood, mocked, doubted, stripped naked in the court of theories and disbelieved. But no ridicule can make Him turn away from us; it's still we who turn away from Him. No death can keep Him down. His love never fails, even when we fail. That 1 reason is enough for me to believe.

"...He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to Him, nothing in His appearance that we should desire Him. He was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain. Like one from whom people hide their faces He was despised, and we held Him in low esteem...... But He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on Him, and by His wounds we are healed " Isaiah 53:2-3,5





 









 




 

So Is It A Lie or The Truth?

My kids are raving about Sherlock Holmes, apparently the latest crime drama series of the famous sleuth created by author and physician Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Produced by BBC Television, it won the 2011 BAFTA TV award for Best Drama Series. I venture it's garnered a huge fan base since it features a handsome hero (as always) and is now modernized into a very contemporary 21st century setting. But most of all it presents an irresistable appeal to every man's innate curiosity about solving mysteries and the celebration of man's pride - the logical deductive processes of the human mind. I sat through 1 1/2 hrs of the latest season episode, which of coz ended in a cliff-hanger but honestly, I have to say it didn't do much for me. Sure, the twists and turns of the plots made for interesting mind-games. Obviously the highlight was on the ingenuity of the detective,  which borders on the fantastic, made even more endearing by his somewhat ascerbic character to whom his side-kick Dr. Watson made a nice contrast. The episode I saw unrolled a grand scheme of  the master villain (of coz there must be one) cooking up an elaborate conspiracy to present the hero as a fraud, and in the process, driving Holmes to commit suicide for the sake of saving his (few) frens left, since the whole world has been successfully manipulated into believing the lie. But of coz, he isn't dead; which leaves everyone panting after the coming season as to how Holmes managed to fake his own death, when he clearly jumped off  a building and ended up very dead, at the feet of a crowd of public witnesses. 

But it got me thinking how a truth can be turned into a lie. I guess it works vice versa too, a lie can be turned into truth. So what gives? We don't need to chase the on-screen adventures of a fictional detective to know that. 2000 years ago, an event occurred in history that till today, people are still arguing  over whether it's true or false. I am sure BBC producers will come up with some great twist of how Sherlock Holmes comes back from the dead, which will undoubtedly leave all the fans gasping in admiration over the sheer genius of this character.  Yet centuries after the event, to date, no one has been able to conclusively explain the resurrection of a dead person named Jesus Christ. Certainly there are tons of conspiracy theories floating around that attempt to offer a plausible  explanation of how a man hung on a cross certified dead ( at least by most expert medical reconstruction), stuffed in a tomb for 3 days, was seen alive by not one, but many and various witnesses in not one, but several locations over a period of 40 more days.

The plan of Moriarty, the criminal mastermind arch-enemy of Holmes, was perfect to a 'T', right down to the minutest detail; that's what made it so believable as the truth even tho it was 1 huge lie. I can't help but think if the resurrection of Jesus Christ was really a lie, it's a very poor and clumsy fabrication indeed. The accounts of the disciples who wrote about the event had so many variations and discrepancies in their details so many 'holes' can be punctured into their claims of a dead man risen alive. In fact, it would make a better object lesson how NOT to tell a lie instead, since the entire story as they tell it is so unbelievable. To make a lie believable the best bet would be to come up with credible witnesses and a consistent version, like Moriarty's meticulously executed scheme.

Yet the first witnesses of Jesus' resurrection were not some notable VIPs of  society but 'mere' women, whose status then hardly qualified them as credible, quite the opposite actually. And there was only 1 consistent thing about the whole affair - Jesus was seen walking around town alive in physical flesh and blood, wearing the physical marks of nailed-pierced hands and a spear-jabbed side. No flimsy apparition floating around like Casper the friendly ghost. Oh, and 500 people saw Him ascend into heaven or as science would prefer to call it outer space. That would probably qualify it as the first recorded case of mass hysteria I suppose. Except the niggling part that all those witnesses were still alive at the time of recording and no one cried Liar, liar, pants on fire. 

Of coz the argument could run that no one bothered to record any denials, contradictory or alternative versions. But considering how many enemies Jesus had, it would have been an easy matter to just produce His dead body to debunk the disciples' claims of His resurrection. But no one did, or rather no one could; because the dead body was seen walking around by so many people. In summary to pull off the resurrection, we are looking at a really really grand conspiracy which required not just the cooperation and cover-up of quarrelsome, faint-hearted, dim-witted disciples (who by the way, had all deserted Jesus at material times) but also a host of diverse characters ranging from hostile religious authorities to 'cant-be-bothered' Roman soldiers on duty to curious 'let's see the show' hangers-on. Oh, and no one got paid to be a witness, no one gained any benefit from contributing to the 'lie', in fact all the disciples got for their insistence that the resurrection was true was marginalization, ridicule, torture and finally death . Heck, if they can't even understand Jesus when He was alive, trying to teach them deep spiritual stuff, why on earth would they defend Him when He was dead? This isn't a case of religious extremists so hung-up on their teacher they are willing to die for him. To the contrary, they were clearly cowards in their desertion and even outright denials of Jesus before the crucifixion. It's a hall-mark of the Bible that it doesn't hide any 'unfavorable' or 'imperfect' stuff; it's as honest as honest can be, right down to the character flaws of perfectly human human beings. 

Of coz one could object I am only depending on a 'mere' book. Well, not exactly a or any book. Sure,  anyone can go right ahead and question the authenticity of the good old Bible. But considering the exhaustive research which has been done regarding the compilation of this book, its accuracy in relation to places, times, dates, culture and method of transmission, to believe that it's just 1 long myth cooked up by a bunch of half-baked fanatics keen to start a new religion requires more faith than a leap into the dark void. Besides, if I wanted to get famous enough to have a world-wide fan-club idolizing me,  I certainly wouldn't choose to 'play dead' and claim to be god. There are much easier and faster ways I am sure, like 'selling' instant wealth, health and power- that's a  guaranteed clincher to 'hook' people in, even now. Or I could just dance like a monkey and put myself on U-tube (since someone else already got famous for horsing around). If I can't dance, I could always write a book about sex, sex and more sex as that seems to be mankind's constant obsession. Certainly one doesn't have to go to such extreme lengths as to die. And for goodness' sake, why choose something as ludicrous and ridiculous  as a resurrection from the dead if you want people to believe you?! - downright hare-brain idea if you ask me, more fitting as the plot for a TV drama series like Sherlock Holmes. 

So what would Sherlock Holmes do with the case of Jesus Christ, if he were to 'deduce' it? Considering the 'evidence' open for examination, if I were him, I would have to say, nope, it's too far-fetched, too unwieldy and too 'untidy' to be a lie. Which only leaves the other side of the coin - it's the truth. The Watergate scandal which cost Richard Nixon the presidency of the United States was an elaborate cover-up which involved dozens of people. Charles Colson was one of those caught and jailed for his part in it. He converted to Christianity whilst in prison and has this to say regarding the resurrection of Jesus Christ, " The Watergate coverup proves that 12 powerful men in modern America couldn't keep a lie, and that 12 powerless men 2000 years ago couldn't have been telling anything else but the truth." 

Sherlock Holmes is just a fictional character, Jesus Christ is real.  Life and God aren't meant to be rationalized away into neat intellectual compartments through a series of clever deductions. They are meant to be experienced and enjoyed. That doesn't require high-powered brain cells, just a willingness to consider and accept that some seemingly impossible things in life can still be true; even though they may appear to be lies. The danger is that we end up treating the Truth as a lie, and the lie as truth.

"Though seeing, they do not see; though hearing, they do not hear or understand." -  Matthew 13:13

The Cat in Us

We have a new cat in the house. I came back from India missions some 4 months ago to be greeted by a scrawny screechy ball of fur. My no.1 princess had impulsively 'rescued' him from the street as he was almost run over by a car; she so 'kesian' him for he seemed to have been abandoned or maybe just lost his mummy-cat. She named him Maffin, with an 'a' instead of 'u'. Apparently he was a bit sick and the kids spent a small fortune on vet, deworming and deflea-ing fees. At first he was supposed to be just a temporary resident in the house till he got better and we could find someone to adopt him. In fact I had nicely made arrangements with one of my staff to do so. But as the days lengthened into weeks and months, the whole adoption plan was abandoned, becoz Maffin had literally stolen his way into the kids' hearts.

As for me, it was more a case of "no, pluhleese, not another cat, no matter how cute..." But 3 votes against 1 is obviously a minority and overridden in our democratic household. So Maffin stayed, much to my chagrin and worse, to the absolute annoyance of the other 2 queen-cats in residence. Especially  our "tigress" Zaza who sulked so much and for so long. Even now, she's barely tolerating the young upstart and is often swiping at and/or chasing him . Even our normally easy-going placid Uggy is sorely tried by the kitty's antics coz he bullies her daily by jumping on top of her, biting her neck and chasing her tail. Uggy is such a sweet 'oldie' she's never been known to growl much but she's growling a lot now.

Me, I can only watch resignedly as Maffin gets into all sorts of capers in all his friskiness. He pokes his head into everything literally - cups of milk, tea, coffee or milo, soup in bowls, empty or full laundry baskets, even bathroom drain outlets (which lids he somehow defly flips up) He 'hunts' everything from cockroaches to snails and pulls at everything from clothes on hangers to dangling wires.  He chews everything he gets his mouth on and drags leaves into the house to decorate my carpet.  He sniffs and jumps at the moving robot vacuum, as if willing it to play catch with him. His paws are forever swiping things off the table . He practices his claw-shredding skills on the newspapers before I get to read them. And then when he feels like being petted, he jumps into my lap to curl up or climbs to sit in the gap between my neck and my chair at the computer table (for some reason, he's got a fetish for that place). He delights in rolling in the dustpan as if it's his bed and of coz he howls like a banshee when my kid puts him to bath. What do you do with a cat like that? Discipline, yep. Unfortunately he doesn't understand commands like No, No No, I said No, or variations like Sit, Stop, Don't, Wait, Watch out, Not there  ....heck he doesn't even respond to his name. I could whack him on the head, grab him by the neck, tweak his ears or nudge him away ever so many times, but all these are only a temporary restraint. He will be back at his tricks in no time. Man, what can you do with a cat like that?? 

The more I observe Maffin and his antics, the more I see the 'naughty cat' traits in humanity. Aren't we all so prone to poke our heads into all sorts of things and end up missing the main thing in life? We get so easily distracted by what Apostle John calls "the world and its desires - the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life" (1 John 2:16-17) that we blithely and merrily go thru life, totally unaware of or uncaring about the reason we were created which is, in the words of Jesus, to 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart,  with all your soul, with all your strength and with all your mind and to love your neighbor as yourself' (Luke 10:27). We spend so much of our time and energy 'hunting' for the best job, best spouse, best house, best clothes, best hand-fone, best whatever-that-catches-our-fickle-fancy for the moment.
In the so-called 'progress' of life on earth, we pull/put down relationships, stab each other in the back and step over one another in climbing the ladder of 'success'. We sweep aside everything and everyone that stands in our way and dig our 'claws' in deep to hang onto what we determine to be 'mine, mine, mine'. We demand our right to be loved at our convenience, our way, our time. And yes, we don't even know we are rolling in the dirt of sin, becoz sin is a dirty word and has been replaced by excuses, justification and political correctness. That's how 'catty' humans have become.
Very like Maffin, we are deaf to God's voice saying No, Don't, and its myriad variations of caution and prohibition. We balk at anything that interferes or curtails our freedom to live as we like, and certainly we object most strongly to anyone attempting to tell us we need 'cleansing'. For awhile perhaps we may feel slightly uneasy when some (holy-moley) person talks about sinners in the hands of an angry God. But sooner or later, it becomes, who cares about God; it's 'just religion', so to each his own; let's just live and let live, every way is the right way as long as we don't hurt others. 

So we carry on like Maffin, blissfully eating, drinking, living, loving, and yes, sinning. In his catty little mind, life is just one big ball-game to be enjoyed whilst it lasts.  I guess that's how we view our life on earth too. But we aren't cats. We are made in the image of our Creator, for a particular purpose. As King David acknowledged, "What is mankind that You are mindful of them, human beings that You care for them? You have made them  a little lower than the angels and crowned them with glory and honor. You made them rulers over the works of Your hands; You put everything under their feet." (Psalm 8:4-6). That doesn't sound like a cat's life to me. So why are we behaving  like cats, intent only on doing 'our thing'?

Yet I have to admit whilst I get angry with Maffin's naughty acts, I also understand he is 'just' a kitten. Likewise, God knows we are 'just' human, as Jesus said it all at the cross, when He was hung for our sins, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34) Even now we don't know what we are doing really when we forget, disbelieve, disobey, reject or simply can't be bothered about God. He could have done given up on us for all the wrong we do, intentionally or unintentionally, knowingly or unknowingly,  like I gave up on Maffin. But instead He loved us to death, literally. The only reason Jesus died on the cross is because He loves us.

Cats know instinctively how to respond to love. Even the little grudging love I give to Maffin, the Terrible (when I am in a generous mood)  is reciprocated with a purr of acknowledgment, a lifting of the head to be stroked and petted some more. Love always elicits and evokes a response. When I see how even a cat can so easily accept the 'crumbs' of love I dish out, I cannot understand how is it that we humans won't respond to the highest sacrificial love of a God (which isn't dependent on His moods or our performance) who went all the way into and beyond death for us, that we might have the one thing that truly matters - abundant eternal life. Hmmm, could it be that on one hand we are too 'catty' simply bull-dozing our way thru life, but on the other, we aren't 'catty' enough to let ourselves be loved..... 

"....And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord's holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God" - Ephesians 3:17 

The Road Back

Can't believe it's 2 years down the road already. In 2011 purely on a whim, I took an unplanned trip to Sg. Lembing to catch the famous rainbow waterfall and mountain sunrise. I caught neither but nevertheless the trip was a one-of-a-kind experience, which I blogged about here. 2 years later, faced with the prospect of a 2 week long school holiday break again, I was at a loose end with nowhere particular to go (at least, nowhere that fits my limited budget), my mind went back to the waterfall that I never caught in Sg. Lembing.  And so on another whim, I called up the guy who had arranged my last trip. He actually remembered me; I guess being the (odd) aunty who came all by herself in the middle of the rainy season, I must have stood out in his memory as one of those 'weirdos' who for some reason, do their holidays alone. Again he couldn't promise me that the rainbow would come out this time... I should have known better than to ask, after all he isn't God. On another whim, I decided to ask the kids to join me this time, since it was only an overnite tingy. Much to my surprise, the 2 girls were all for it and though the boy protested a little, I signed up the whole family anyway.


A week before the trip, I asked for prayer cover at our regular cell meeting. As the sister who had been assigned my request prayed, I sensed this trip wasn't just a 'personal whim' or fancy after all. She released God's covenant blessing over my family, making reference to the time when God sealed His promises to Noah and his children by setting a rainbow in the clouds after the great flood wiped out all life on earth (Genesis 9:8-17). I had expected the 'normal' prayer for protection and good weather; but God led this sister to pray way beyond that. I knew full well the significance of the rainbow covenant God made with Noah. It was meant to be an everlasting covenant for all generations to come that He would never again destroy the earth by flood. The rainbow in the sky marked a brand new beginning for the survivors in Noah's Ark. It was a covenant initiated by God to give hope, a sign of His eternal love that no matter what sin humanity is guilty of, He will exercise grace . I took that sister's prayer to heart, appropriating it as a very personal word from the Lord, that indeed He has heard the fervent prayer of a widow/single mother for my generations to come and assuring me He is merciful. As much as the rainbow symbolized a new day, so surely would my children be brought forth into a new season in their lives. How beautiful the prayer that is birthed of the Holy Spirit; it reveals the very heart-beat of God even though it comes through man's lips.


2 days before the trip, stuck in a traffic jam on a rainy evening whilst I was driving the family out for dinner, there it was - a rainbow across the sky. To anyone else's eyes, it was 'just' another rainbow, nothing unusual about it. But for me, it was His very personal way of confirming His promise even before the trip. Am I reading too much into a random act of nature? Surely it's 'just coincidence' that there was a rainbow when I 'just happened' to go out that nite. As far as I am concerned, there's nothing random, no coincidences in life; everything happens for a reason. Sometimes I don't get it, sometimes I ignore it, sometimes I don't even want it, and sometimes it's only years later I realize its significance. Albert Einstein said "Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous." If that is so, we should give God the credit instead of hiding behind politically correct terms in trying to explain spiritual things from a secular point of view. Someone once said, “From where we stand the rain seems random. If we could stand somewhere else, we would see the order in it."

Apostle Paul prayed for "the eyes of our hearts to be enlightened in order that we may know the hope to which God has called us, the riches of His glorious inheritance in His holy people, and His incomparably great power for us who believe." (Ephesians 1:18-19) What the heart 'sees' is not the same as what the ordinary eye sees. So whilst it is absolutely scientifically correct that as Wikipedia defines it, a rainbow is just "an optical and meteorological phenomenon that is caused by reflection of light in water droplets in the earth's atmosphere, resulting in a spectrum of light appearing in the sky", the eyes of my heart see something else so much more beautiful and meaningful, because I am looking at it from the perspective of a Noah. And it's with that perspective that I set off, down the road all the way back to Sg Lembing, this time with the whole family.

Expectations were high, not to mention I went with some half-baked notion of how romantic it would be, but the reality was something else. It was a loooong and grilling journey into the interior. The kind of modified 4WDs used can only 'pass license' in Sg Lembing, I am sure. These vehicles were built up with roof (not just to shut out the sun, but to ward off branches which were apt to swing into your face), and horizontal long seats that could pack 20 pax into 1 vehicle. Multiply that by the number of people going on any 1 trip and you get an idea of the size of the crowd.  Our driver estimated that morning easily 200 pax were all gung-ho-ing up the mountain trail - so much for the romance part!!. And what a bone-rattling, body-shaking trail it was - adventurous old aunty opted for a seat at the back and endured 2 hours (return trip) rough-riding thru the forest, bumping thru streams, muddy and rocky paths. Then followed another hour of wading thru waist-high river-waters and climbing uphill narrow wet, muddy and rocky pathways before we hit the highest point of the falls. This was truly an adventure for the adventurous, with everything thrown in. 

The first sight of the falls was pretty awesome - cascades of tumbling waters from on high, a constant spray of water and mist falling and a cold wind blowing in the face. And yes, there it was - a tiny sliver of a rainbow. It wasn't exactly what I expected - the 'normal' rainbow I am used to admiring is so high up in the sky and so perfectly arched...this one was like a half-formed miniature. But as I sat on the rock opposite viewing it for a long time, ignoring the crowd, I noted how 'alive' it seemed, becoz of the tumbling waters and the changing angle of the sun, the rainbow was "moving" all the time. And it appeared different viewed from different positions. One would have assumed the higher the better but it was near to the bottom just as I was trying to weave my way down thru the madding crowd that I caught sight of my 'bonus' - a double rainbow. 

The kids weren't impressed tho. Well, after travelling a total of 5 1/2 hrs 1 way out of which were 2 hrs of tough terrain, and all you get is a 'slice' of a rainbow (without any pot of gold) and having to contend with a whole mass of humanity, I can understand how they feel it's too much hype and too much trouble. Me, I came back to chase a rainbow, and I caught 2. It wasn't exactly spectacular, but then again, God doesn't always give us the spectacular. Mine would be a very poor faith indeed if I always insist God prove Himself in eye-popping earth-shattering  miracles. Watching the rainbow 'dance' amidst the curtain of waters, my heart was secured in the certainty my God is very much alive and working actively to bring His promises to pass in all things and all situations.  He has shown me not 1, but 3 rainbows already. That's a covenant thrice renewed. What more can I ask? I am glad I took the long hard road back. 

Cementing my faith were 2 messages that came in on our return journey. One was from a Pastor I don't know at all, since I have seen him only a couple of times so far; but out of the blue, every now and then, he would send me very appropriate Words somehow, just when I needed to hear it. What he quoted from the Bible spoke to my heart as he referred me to the time when King David praised God "I praise Your name for Your unfailing love and faithfulness, for Your promises are backed by all the Honor of Your name."(Psalm 138:2). Another came from a dearly loved sister, a prayer warrior who reminded me my God is "A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows" (Psalm 68:5), that "The Lord will destroy the house of the proud, but He will establish the boundary of the widow" (Proverbs 15:25). How gracious my Abba Father is; knowing the "me of little faith", He never stops telling me through so many ways, by so many people, that He will do what He says He will do for me, for His own name sake, and because He loves me and my family. I guess He's trying to tell me by now, I really should  learn to live without rainbows......

 "There is no God in heaven above or on earth below like You, who keep Your covenant and mercy with Your servants who walk before You with all their hearts." - 1 Kings 8:23

 Click  fotos

Does It Really Matter?

I am now re-reading the one book in the Bible that I always feel ambivalent about; I both hate and love it. I love Ecclesiastes for its sheer poetry and I hate it because it can be so depressing. Indeed it's been called the saddest book in the Bible. Written by a monarch who was gifted by God with "wisdom and very great insight, and a breadth of understanding as measureless as the sand on the seashore" (1 Kings 4:29), for one who started so well in life, I always wonder how Solomon ended up this way, sounding so..... tired and beat-up? How can someone who penned such profound and poignant thoughts....

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: 
a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,  
a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, 
a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,  
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, 
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, 
a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,  
a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, 
a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. ... (Eccl. 3:1-8)

also be the same guy who declared in the same breath...
"Meaningless! Meaningless!"Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless (Another version puts it even stronger, "Vanity of vanities, all is vanity) .....I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind. ....I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure. My heart took delight in all my labor, and this was the reward for all my toil. Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun....the dead, who had already died, are happier than the living, who are still alive. But better than both is the one who has never been born (Eccl. 1:2,14, 2:10-11, 4:2-3)

Man, talk about a serious case of depression. Surely by all standards, Solomon had nothing to be depressed about - he was king over Israel which under his reign achieved its greatest territorial extent. The world literally came to sit at his feet. God poured upon him so much additional blessings of wealth, possessions and honor, such as no king before and none after him had ever had (2 Chronicles 1:12). He undertook and completed the greatest building project of ancient times in the construction of the magnificent First Temple in Jerusalem which took 3 years to prepare and another 7 1/2 years to finish, utilizing in the process 3,000 tons of gold, 30,000 tons of silver, and furnishing it with staggering treasures in its interiors. This was a guy who had no lack of wine, women and song in his courts. So what happened? Perhaps the modern pyschologist would put it down to a typical case of having too much of a good thing . Or maybe just maybe this was a man who finally stopped long enough to ask himself the ultimate question every thinking human being will ask one day- what is life, my life, all about?

Solomon had everything going for him , yet by the time he wrote Ecclesiastes, it seemed as if nothing really mattered anymore. In the end, after much pondering , Solomon had this to say, "Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind. For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil" (Ecc. 12:13-14) I don't know about others, but I have felt very much like Solomon before, when you come to a point in life where you wonder.... Does it really matter whether I live or die... does it really matter if there is a heaven and a hell? Isn't living a good life on earth all that matters? Does God really matter? After all, I have been living life well enough without God; what's the difference with or without, life still goes on anyway, and it will end anyway. Besides why should I 'surrender' to a Being who can't even prove His own existence? What really matters?? Solomon concluded God matters because (whether we believe it or not) all of mankind will stand to be judged before Him.

I reached the same conclusion though from another angle. I realized though I may think life is just about living the best I can, doing what good I can, and then calling it a day when I return ashes to ashes, dust to dust, the truth is my life matters to someone other than I. And I am not talking about loved ones, family or friends. These people are there to grace my life, indeed I am very grateful to have and to love them and to be loved by them. Still these too will all pass away one day, whether before or after me. But there is One who has me in His thoughts for eternity, who created my inmost being; knit me together in my mother's womb, when even my frame was not hidden from Him, His eyes already saw my unformed body; all the days of my life were ordained for me , written in His book before one of them came to be (Psalm 139:13,15,16) This One knows everything about me, all the good, the bad, the beautiful, the ugly and seeks after me like a lover pursuing his beloved. He will not let me go even when I let Him go; He is faithful even when I am faithless. My life matters to Jesus so much He died for me, so that I could live- not just a 'good' life - but a forever life made right with God and man. A life that can and should go beyond simply living, loving and dying to remain just a temporary memory (good or bad) in the fleetingness of finite time on this earth.

Max Lucado in his book "No Wonder They Call Him Savior" tells of a disenchanted young Christian who in his own words, 'grew up in church, wanted to go into ministry, took all the courses, the theology, the languages, the exegesis' and in spite of a degree in theology still 'quit on God.' His question to Max was simple, "What really matters? ...Don't talk to me about religion...I just want to know what counts." The question stumped him and it was years down the line before Max figured out the answer, in his own words, 'The part that matters is the cross. No more, no less... It rests on the time line of history like a compelling diamond. Its tragedy summons all sufferers. Its absurdity attracts all cynics. Its hope lures all searchers....My, what a piece of wood! History has idolized it and despised it, gold-plated it and burned it, worn and trashed it. History has done everything to it but ignore it. That's the one option that the cross does not offer. No one can ignore it! A crucified carpenter claiming He is God on earth??...Its bottom line is sobering; if the account is true, it is history's hinge...if not, it is history's hoax... that's why the cross is what matters.'

And I can only add, it's because of the cross that I matter. I matter so much to God that He did everything necessary to save me, a sinner from the judgement of certain death. When I look to the cross where Jesus hung dead, I understand God's declaration and affirmation that He so so loves me , He loves...me . When I ponder on the resurrection of Jesus Christ , I am assured my life doesn't stop when I draw my last breath on earth; because I have called on His name, there is still an eternity to enjoy, secure in the greatest love of God. It blows my mind that I am created and meant to be more than a memory. And yes, it matters.

"For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures"... 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 



  

Whose Fault Is It?

A wife cries on receiving news of her husband's terminal cancer. A jogger gets mugged and raped, and the rapist gets off scot-free on a legal technicality. There's another earthquake in China, a tornado in Oklahoma, a freak nuclear leak in Japan. Hundreds of thousands die everyday all over the world. The randomness of accidents; one minute your best friend is talking with you on the phone, within the next hour, you see fotos of his still body splashed all over Fb, victim of a hit-n-run. Innocent lives lost through no fault of their own. Evil running rampant unchecked. Bad things happen to good people. Bad people prosper. It's senseless. If God was so loving, so powerful and so good, why doesn't he stop all the bad and wrong stuff in life from happening before it happens?? He must be very cruel to just watch from his tower in heaven and not lift a finger to bring an end to madness and sadness on earth. It's either he can't or he won't be bothered. Perhaps god is sleeping on the job; he should be fired then. If there was a god who created the universe, he shouldn't let it be or go on in such a mess; it's highly irresponsible. At the very least he should explain himself. What a useless "Boss". Why talk of heaven when he can't even handle earth? Or maybe there's just no god up there or anywhere for that matter. Man will just have to deal with life and death himself. Some justifiably angry souls would undoubtedly declare - To hell with god.

Well, indulge me a moment. Listen to what God might have to say about it....Didn't I tell you not to eat that fruit? Didn't I warn you this is exactly what would happen? Do you even realize what you have done; that with one bite, you have condemned yourself and all your kind for all eternity? Do you not understand? How many people have I sent to nudge, counsel, advise, preach, nag, lecture and bore you to death (pun intended) about sin? How many times must you be told anyway before you 'get it'? Wasn't that big flood enough to wake you up to repent? Do you know how I grieve watching you destroy everything I have ever created good, beautiful and perfect? Do you honestly think I am talking about the atmosphere, animals or trees? I am talking about you. Why is it you won't let me save you? Is it my fault for giving you freedom to do all things, even wrong things? What, so now it's my fault for not sorting out the mess you made? Don't you see, I already sorted it out for you?! Why is it you can't believe I love you? What do I need to do to prove it - die for you? Ok, I have done it, so why is it you still don't believe?

What's our answer to all that 'sin, judgment and Jesus saves' stuff? Can't be true. Can't be proven, so just... Can't be. Yet if we are the rational people we pride ourselves to be, knowing there are always 2 sides to a coin, have we ever considered the why's and wherefore's of life from God's perspective? If we could take a trip with Him down memory lane to the time it all started when.... "In the beginning, God created.." There in Genesis Chapters 1 and 2 is the blueprint - the original design of Paradise and Man, the way it should be; where everything was created to be good, perfect and eternal. It was only in Chapter 3 that everything unraveled ...and Humpty-Dumpty Man had a great Fall, and all the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty-Dumpty Man back together again. Humpty -Dumpty fell off the wall because eggs can't sit on walls, Man fell because he chose to exercise his (God-given) freedom to go his own way. You might say he pushed God off the throne of his life and plopped himself there.

Apostle Paul explains it very well, "For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse. For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools... Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done." -Romans 1:20-22, 28.  God 'gave them over' - in plainer English, God says,' Go ahead, whaaatever.... get depraved if that's what you want. It's up to you to choose to believe and follow Me, or to disbelieve and go your own way.  The consequences will be yours to bear, but I will always be here for you; I will never leave nor forsake you'.

But ....surely that's 'not very nice' of God? As my princess no. 2 so imaginatively puts it, it's like a parent letting her kid walk off a cliff knowing that it's life-threatening, and then if the kid doesn't die in the process, picks him up, puts him into hospital and pays the medical bills. Of coz by then the kid may have to spend his remaining life in a wheelchair. What kind of God does that? My answer, if I am that parent, is also not 'very nice' . When I have done all I can do to get my kid to stay away from the cliff and he still insists on walking over it, becoz he wants to exercise his freedom , honestly, I will step back and let him walk off , even if it's obviously going to pain me very very much watching him do it. That may not be kind, but if all my kid is interested in is his right to live life his way, then I would let him go do it. Don't I love my kid? Of coz but let's not confuse kindness with love. Ask any parent with kids; we don't have to be kind to love them. That's why I will be there to pick up my kid at the bottom of the cliff....But it would be too late; he would be a cripple for life. Well, I am sorry, kiddo. That's the consequence of a choice you made. So please don't blame me (or God) for it.

We can't have it both ways. Why should God be held accountable for the results of a decision that we don't like when we are the ones who chose it, especially when we have already been forewarned about it? It doesn't take an Isaac Newton to tell us for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. What do we expect, honestly, you mean it's acceptable that after we wilfully go bang our own head against a wall and get hurt, then we turn around and say, Hey, God, you didn't take care of me enough; you should have removed that wall from my head?! The point is obvious - it's not God's fault if we don't listen or obey. Like someone put it so succintly, God doesn't send people to hell. We choose to go there ourselves.

To blame God for allowing bad things to happen is to fail to understand that ever since Adam messed up in Eden , we have lived and continue to live in a fallen world of fallen man, where bad things will happen. What, so we blame our long-dead-and-gone ancestor? Put it this way, Adam started the ball rolling, and we are the ones still in the 'game', playing with the same ball everyday. It wasn't just Adam who pushed God out of his life - all of us are still at it - doing things, living life our way, instead of His way. Perhaps if we bothered to admit that fact, then we won't be so quick to 'judge' God for what He does or doesn't do, when the horrible consequences of man's choices hit us and our world.

Then perhaps we will appreciate the reason that He seems so 'unconcerned' about all the evil, suffering and bad things going on is because He's already dealt with them, in a way we can never really fully comprehend within the limitations of this puny human brain of ours. Sure God could send armies of angels to pluck people off dangerous cliffs, but that wouldn't have solved the problem, which is really people who will keep insisting to go their way, not cliffs. Once when I was jogging my way round the field during my morning exercise routine, it struck me how every few days, even despite obvious regular mowing and upkeep, the love-grass would spring up so fast and stick to my shoes and socks. Its very irritating to say the least as it's tedious and difficult to pull off. (I have since stopped bothering to pull them out, resulting in obviously dirty and ugly shoes). And I recall how my husband tended our garden - he didn't mow, he painstakingly pulled out weed after weed by the root to make sure those pesky plants would never grow again (these days the gardener I call to come takes the normal easy way - he mows). Of coz new weeds promptly sprang up in no time, but there it is, that's the futility of man's attempts.

Well, God doesn't mess around with the gardens of human souls. He went straight to the root of the matter. He won't stop man from sinning - it's our call. And it's not because He doesn't love us, it's precisely because He loves us that He gives everyone the freedom to make choices in life, with very clear warnings as to the ultimate consequences of those choices. He won't take away the consequences either, because that would run counter to the rules of the game - you sin, you pay, with death - that's a certainty; the law of justice that must be satisfied. God didn't overwrite that law against us; instead He fulfilled it for us - He sent Jesus Christ, to pay our penalty. If He were unkind, He would simply have sat back and 'let us stew in our own juices'. He could have been that parent who's just waiting to condemn the rebellious kid who got into trouble, "See, I told you so....Now let's see you get out of this hell-hole yourself". He didn't. Instead God con-descended from heaven and once and for all, pulled out the poisonous sin-root that kills man- He overcame death for all men for all time. Jesus died on the cross and rose alive, presenting us a choice to believe and a chance to get it right once more, to regain what mankind lost 'in the beginning'....

Whose fault is it again? We should know better.

"Therefore, as through one man (Adam)'s offense judgment came to all men, resulting in  condemnation, even so through one Man (Jesus)'s righteous act, the free gift came to all men, resulting in justification of life. For as by one man's disobedience many were made sinners, so also by one Man's obedience many will be made righteous" - Romans 5:18-19

Alive!

"Aunty, he's alive lah" "Huh?, who, Jesus? Right, Jesus is alive; that's what I just shared," I was getting a bit confused. I am still getting used to the way some of these people who come to the street-feeding talk their lingo. "No, aunty, that one you say died. I saw him la." "You mean TS, the drunk...no, really?..cannot be, you sure or not?" "Aiyah, aunty, why you don't believe me?" And he stalked off in a huff, quite hurt that I doubted. I slapped myself inwardly...immediately Jesus' words rebuked me, "O ye of little faith..." After all the preaching I have shared with these people on the dead being resurrected, here I am, doubting it myself. Another fella nearby piped up, "Ya, aunty, really..I saw him also "

I told myself, "This I have gotta see." I remembered sharing sometime ago about this guy whom I was told had apparently died after getting walloped in a fight. (He was the one who at one time made me so ashamed I wrote a whole story about him here   My heart had been very heavy when I heard the news of his passing, and being much moved, I had talked about it as I shared the message that Saturday. Now people are telling me he's alive? I was curious, what happened? If only he was here....

And he was indeed. As I moved over to the medical station, there he stood, in the flesh, yes, very much alive. And amazingly so changed in appearance and demeanor. "You are alive," I smiled at him. "Sure I am, who say I die? I got little bit stomach pain here, and my head..." he pointed to his body, as the volunteer handed him the medication. I caught hold of his hand and sat him down on a nearby chair. His transformation was fantastic. He was totally sober, his eyes clear. Dressed in clean and very decent clothes, his hair cut short and tidy, he looked every bit a handsome young man. Amidst trying to understand his heavy foreign accent and broken Malay, all I could gather was that he had somehow been 'rescued' by his abang/adik who had come back from America and was now comfortably staying with them in a rented apartment. I asked him what he had been doing all this while; he replied "Pray". I probed further, "To whom?" He wagged his head as he pointed up to heaven, "Yesus". My heart rejoiced; he had not forgotten the name he had called out, even in his drunken stupor the last time I ministered to him. "Halleluia" I said, and he replied, "Amen." "Are you still drinking?", I had to ask. "That one, devil, strong," he pursed his lips - at least now he could identify the enemy of his soul and was obviously fighting back. "Jesus stronger," I reminded him. "Amen," was the soft reply.

As the people dispersed, some of them saw us talking and came over... "Eh, you not dead, still alive?" I think he was getting a bit cheezed off by how everyone seemed to think he had died (no thanks in part to my sharing, I am sure) He started rattling off in his mother-tongue to one of his country-men sitting beside us, who was happily smiling away at all the attention. I turned to face the others who had gathered around "Ya man, he's alive, just like Jesus... He knows Jesus, do you?" A youth with dyed brown hair and tattoos on his arms nodded enthusiastically, "Since I was 15, aunty... my sister, my father mother got back together because of Jesus, now only my brother who don't wanna make amends with me..." He was grinning from ear to ear. The other guy with him put a hand up in the air as I looked in his direction, very quick to stop me from asking further..."I very soon, aunty, soon." In this alley, they all knew this old aunty who can't stop talking about Jesus. How many times they must have heard me repeat the same old lines, "Jesus loves you. He died and rose again alive to give you life. Do you understand?"

Saying, preaching, even believing it is one thing. But seeing a 'dead' man so alive in front of me is another. It didn't matter what the real story was. Whether it was a case of mistaken identity or miscommunication, whether it was a rumor, how his relatives found him....none of that mattered. Only 1 thing mattered - where once upon a time, for all intents and purposes, even if he had not physically died, this incorrigible drunk was as good as dead, now he was gloriously alive. And he knows who his Savior is. Just a couple of days before I had been sharing with the kids the Bible record of Jesus delivering a man possessed by 6000+ demons. So tormented he tore the chains and shackles people tried to 'tame' him with,  went around naked, cut himself with stones and resided in the town cemetery. By the time Jesus finished off the demons, the man was found sitting at His feet, fully clothed and in his right mind (Mark 5:1-15).

And that is how TS, the ex-drunk appeared to me. He had spent years on the street in the horrible 'possession' of something that was killing him off, destroying his body, spirit and soul. No one could reach him. Many had tried before, and honestly to our shame, we had all given up. Seeing him restored 'in his right mind', I am reminded of the unfailing love of God for the most wretched, the ones everybody gives up on. And how mighty the power of God to literally raise up a man destroyed and 'dead' to give him a brand new life - that's resurrection power. The same power that raised Jesus up alive from the grave 2013 years ago. What happened then is still happening now. Praise God.

 "And you He made alive, who were dead in trespasses and sins...God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved)" ... Ephesians 2:1, 4-5