God (and Life) Isn't Fair

  

I was at a loose end over a long week-end holiday and on the spur of the moment decided to catch a movie, just to relax alone somewhere other than in the house. There was just 1 last available seat left for the afternoon matinee of The Impossible, a dramatization based on the true account of 1 family's harrowing experience of the 2004 Indian Ocean tsunami which hit some 9 countries and resulted in an estimated 250 thousand deaths. I am a sucker for life stories, and besides this one got high review ratings as well.

Indeed it's a very well-done movie, supported by a cast of excellent actors, especially the children who portrayed the Benett family. All the pathos and emotion of what words can never really describe was ably captured on the big screen. Seeing the scale of destruction, panic and chaos magnified up there, I can't even imagine how bad the reality must have been for the people affected. As the story goes, the entire  Benett family  ultimately reunited, but their survival only sharpens the poignancy of the unasked and unanswered question - what about the rest who didn't? There must be so many many more grieving families whose lives must carry on despite their loss.

Truly how frail is human life; here today and gone tomorrow. We are but a 'mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes' (James 4:14).  One minute we could be enjoying life to the hilt with nary a care at all,  the very next second the ground (or in this case the ocean) could just swallow us up. How sad that it takes a tragedy to shake us up and remind us of the fragility of life that we too often take for granted. It's always the case that we only appreciate the preciousness of something when we lose it.

What pulled at my heart-strings particularly was the reunion of the father with his 3 sons. The chances were well-nigh impossible for all of them, separated as they were, to be in the same vicinity on the same street at that same moment in time. What else does one call the impossible but a miracle? And who can wrought miracles except the God of the impossible? Which just goes to show that in the darkest most hopeless of all situations, God is able to turn things around for good.

Obviously the objection arises why didn't God do the same for other families searching for their loved ones or better yet, why didn't He just stop the tsunami in its tracks? For every survivor, how  many perished? For every family that celebrated, how many grieved and no doubt still continue to grieve the loss of dearly beloved? The poignancy  rips at the heart. Why is it that God seems to bless one person and not another ? Is He 'playing games' with humankind? Are we just nothing more than 'chess pieces' He arbitrarily moves around at His whim and fancy? If God can grant us a parking lot in a crowded shopping mall, why can't/won't He do something about all the evil in the world? Why pray, after all since God is supposedly sovereign, He will just do whatever He wants to do in the first place anyhow?  Why would I want to believe, much less trust a God who seems so 'unfair' in His dealings? No wonder so many don't want to bother with or about God anymore. Easier to just live life according to as and how we like it than grapple with tough questions which garner either no or rather unsatisfactory answers.

I have had my share of tough questions (I still do, by the way). I could say God 'refused' to cure my husband's cancer, despite my faith and tons of prayers. I remember a fren who to this day, can't forgive God for 'letting' her innocent baby die. And sure, I asked why, who wouldn't? Strange we have no problem accepting 'happy' things, but when we are unhappy over something, the first question is Why like this, wan? After all my asking, the answer inevitably comes back to  "Because He is God." I know, it's not a 'nice' answer. The cynic understandably says "You Christians have got it pat down. If something good happens, you say Praise the Lord. If something bad happens, you say It's God's will. Either way, God wins." The problem with that is,  in the first place, it's not about winning or losing against God.

In case we have forgotten, He's on our side. If we think our suffering is so so bad, what about the suffering of a  totally innocent Man's crucifixion on the cross? It took Jesus 3 excruciating hours to die strung up between heaven and earth. What's that - you say you never asked Jesus to die for you? Precisely. None of us asked for it. But He did it anyway, not because anyone asked for it, but becoz everyone needs it, though no one knew it then and many still don't know it now. Actually God could simply vapourise this earth (and all mankind) in the blink of an eye, but He didn't; the sun is still rising and setting everyday; people are still marrying, partying, and living (without God). God could have washed His hands off us and let us all go to hell, but He didn't, instead He laid down His own deity, came down as one of humankind, gave up His own earthly life so that all who choose to believe Him can have eternal life.  It certainly wasn't a fair exchange for Jesus; He was without sin, why should He die for sinners such as I? Of all the 'why' questions in life that anyone can ask, I think this must be the toughest, for I will never be able to comprehend the nature of this divine love of Christ that is so driven, so passionate, that He would willingly sacrifice Himself for the sake of people who don't want, don't understand or don't appreciate it.
 
"Why" must be the all-time favorite question asked by kids. Every answer is met with another Why, until such time the parent in exasperation simply shuts up the child by the final answer - Because your mother/father say so. In my days, that was sufficient to put a stop to all further questions; I accepted the authority of my parents as...well, authority, even though I may not be exactly happy about it.  It didn't make me doubt their love for me. I guess that's how I finally learnt to accept my own finite limitations as a created being. After all, who am I to question my Creator? What do I know about running the universe in the first place? The Bible never says that God is fair; but there's an awful lot that says God is just and righteous. I am not privy to God's ways of thinking or doing. But I do know the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength (1 Cor.1:25).  If He seems arbitrary it's only becoz He knows what He is doing, and I don't. He sees the whole of eternity whilst my eye-sight is so short I can't even see beyond the end of my nose. If He doesn't do things my way, it's because He knows a better way. If He doesn't answer my Why questions, He simply wants to teach me something else.

Many things I may not understand, many 'whys' may not be answered to my satisfaction, but one unshakeable truth I do know  - God loves me, and He really knows best. If I let Him into my life, every good  comes by His grace, every bad can be redeemed. It doesn't  make  trouble easier to bear, but it does teach me that I can live well in spite of it. It doesn't mean all my prayers will be answered how I want them answered, but it does mean He answers everyone of them in His time, in His way, for the simple reason I acknowledge Him as my Abba Father, and He acknowledges me as His child.  It doesn't mean there are no more tough questions in life, but it does mean this foundational truth enables me to live by faith, trusting that He is forever faithful.

"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth....   those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint..." Isaiah 40:28,31

Clueless without GPS

     

So there goes another Chinese New Year. As usual, the kids were moaning and groaning about having to join the annual ‘exodus’ balik kampung. Maklumlah, it was a tiring 400 odd km from KL to Alor Star and that's only 1 way. Moreover there were inconveniences for all parties, both for our hosts and ourselves. But looking back, we all knew deep in our hearts it was the right thing to do. More than just a 'duty/obligation’, the effort speaks volumes about caring enough to put aside one’s own comfort and desires to keep the family bond alive. I think I can be justifiably proud of my kids who stuck through hours sitting around people they don’t know and can’t communicate with, since they are all ‘bananas’, never having learnt to speak their native/any other Chinese dialect. (Of coz,  I would add fiddling with their hand-phones helped ease the boredom somewhat)

But after all that’s said and done, it was a good trip. A day before CNY eve we had driven up for a 'quickie' overnite stay at Gunung Jelai resort. At 1200 ft above sea level, the mountain air was cold and fresh, the surroundings beautiful as only nature can be. Trekking to the nearby Alur Naga falls was well worth the effort, though only princess no.1 dared dip into its ice-cold waters. Capped with a very yummy and dirt-cheap ikan bakar lunch in a Gurun 'restaurant' by the road, this side-trip proved to be a most enjoyable diversion. On the return leg after the usual rounds of 'pai nien' in Alor Star, we detoured into Penang on the very day Psy was in town doing his million $ gig. No, we weren't that hard-up to join the human 'jam’ where he was performing. We were there to visit my brother-in-law and stay a day in his newly-constructed house, which apparently took 7 long years and a court-case before it was finally completed. We managed to catch a couple of fun hours at the beach, after enduring a bumper-2-bumper crawl along the one and only road leading there. On our final morning, thanks to no. 2 princess’ local fren who acted as guide, we joined crowds of tourists q-ing to take photos of Pg’s famous street wall-art. I had hoped for a relatively jam-free drive back to KL, but instead it took us an excruciatingly looonng 7 hrs to reach home, enduring rain and heavy traffic all the way. I had not realized that it was the end of the weekend holiday break, and everyone was starting work on the morrow. No wonder it seemed as if half of M’sia was heading into KL city. Thankfully we could take turns at the wheel.

And talking about driving, I discovered this nifty tingy called a GPS whilst getting lost, (as I am prone to, being the ‘directionally-challenged’ type) around Alor Star and Penang. All my girl had to to was key in a word or two, and presto, a disembodied female voice would call out turn left, turn right to the last meter of road, the next traffic light, or the roundabout ahead. I didn’t have to think which way to take at all, so it was pretty handy to an old aunty who, as the years roll by, can only rely so much on physical landmarks (which have a way of disappearing off the landscape to be replaced with totally unfamiliar ones), especially since she only passes the way once a year! It’s so easy-peasy to get lost – all it takes is one wrong turn to end up in a strange never-seen before neighborhood; it gets worse if the roads are one-way, like almost all Penang roads are these days. So I can understand why people are ready to trust their very life to the GPS in their phone.

Yet there have been times when that ting seems to bark out weird commands, like the time it told us to swing into Sg Petani (Utara) whilst we were driving along a perfectly fine, straight, free-flowing highway into Penang. As per its usual style, it took us left, right, ahead and finally out back into the very same highway by the Sg Petani (Selatan) toll. That’s half-an-hour, petrol and toll money wasted. Hmm, maybe it likes Sg Petani. Or the time when it called out “Police ahead”; and I was thinking, How cool, it even alerts on road-blocks, but then, never a shadow of a policeman showed up at all. I have also heard (horror) stories of how a GPS directed someone to a cemetery – at nite no less.

Which only goes to show you can trust machines but only just that much. Humans unfortunately aren’t much better either. My style when I get lost - I drive till I hit a petrol/police station (whichever comes first) and ask a 2-legged homo sapiens for directions. They, like the GPS machine, will instruct me turn left, turn right wherever and most times, I somehow end up at the right place. But again, like the GPS tingy, sometimes, the human directions go haywire and don’t quite ‘connect’…which leads me to the next petrol/police station of coz.

And I got to thinking how is it we can place so much trust on a talking machine or for that matter, a fallible fellow human being, without question and yet can’t trust God to direct our life’s journeys? It’s incomprehensible to me why we can take a little machine’s word that this or that way is correct in totally blind faith. We safely assume the machine is right in directing us onto the shortest route, getting around traffic jams, accidents or police blocks. Yet we will never know whether in fact there were such things ahead or how bad they were, because we simply obeyed ‘the voice’ and avoided that particular path. Does our trust come about because we "know" that the GPS is backed up by a ‘reliable’ data bank of coordinates and info keyed in, processed and churned out as ‘intelligible responses’ whenever we punch in a destination? After all, if its source comes from no less than 24 satellite 'eyes' floating somewhere up there in the sky, operating 24/7, 365 days round the clock round the globe, it should be 100% accurate to the last decimal point. Yet, the average man's 'knowledge' of the workings of a GPS is actually zilch; we only depend on what we see, hear or read about it. On the basis of purely physical attributes, we 'trust' it....Well and good for those who are ready to swear, live and die by a machine, created by mere mortals.

Then why can’t we trust the Almighty God whose power not only exceeds any/every satellite in space, but who created all that space in the first place? After all we are told "For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him" (2 Ch.16:9) His data bank is infinite to the extent that He numbers all the hairs on our heads (Mat.10:30) He tells us that even before we were formed in our mother’s womb, He already knew us full well (Jer.1:6). How can, you ask? Why can't, seeing as to how He simply breathed into a lifeless lump of dust and turned an ‘it’ into a ‘he’, a man full of life? (Gen.2:7)

A GPS may do very well to help us avoid traffic jams but my God commands thunderstorms and rough seas to be still, He walks me through fire and deep waters, even right through the valley of the shadow of my husband's death He has carried me. Unlike a GPS, He doesn’t always shield me from accidents, but He has always taken care of every pain. In fact Jesus' calling card says He specializes in healing broken bodies, hearts, spirit and soul. Best of all, quite unlike a GPS, my Jesus loves me.

And consider one more thing, my God doesn’t need to be recharged. The GPS was of absolutely no use on our return journey, since the power source it was hooked up to (the handphone) die-ded. We just had to keep driving along in 'spurts' along the busy h/way, since a dead GPS obviously can't offer any alternative routes. When we noticed jams spilling out of rest-stops and even petrol stations, I decided to skip a refuel, thinking we should be able to ‘tahan’ all the way, since it only took 1 tank when we were traveling up. I guess I am not a very good ‘risk calculator’, as we got to running dangerously low on petrol. I am sure no GPS could have saved us if we had been stranded in the middle of nowhere then, even if it was activated. But thank God He is THE Power that’s always active and responsive to those who call on Him. So as the petrol signal indicator blinked and blinked, I prayed and prayed....And as we exited into Rawang town, there - just a little way off from the toll-gate - was the welcome light of a petrol station, without any queue in sight. 

 As I filled up the tank, it struck me no man-made GPS no matter how intelligent, no matter how hi-tech, can ever direct me to my ultimate home sweet home in heaven. A million trillion zillion satellites in the sky can't plot heaven's coordinates. No smart-phone, no matter what latest version, can connect me direct to my Abba Father anytime everytime anywhere everywhere. For all the directions I need to journey through this road called my life, I only need to trust in a divine GPS - God's Promises Secured - which carries only 1 brand name - Jesus Christ.

What is a GPS but 1 out of millions of discardable, dispensable, disposable ‘smart things’ that man continue to invent. Jesus, on the other hand,  isn’t a clever gadget we can program to come up with the answers we want. He isn't something we can turn on/off at a whim. Strange that we would rather rely on inanimate ‘things’ that pass away with the next upgrade instead of  a living, eternal God. Odd that we can blithely allow a machine to direct us into unknown paths and yet reject God’s invitation to walk with Him into the certainty of a blessed life. We choose to obey the disembodied voice of a machine, but tune out the voice of a real inter-relational God. We choose to submit to a machine’s automatic ‘commands’, but rebel against God’s personal call. What did you say? - God can't be compared to a GPS?? Of coz He can't. And that's precisely my point - nobody thinks twice about putting faith in this wonder-machine, or in lots of other 'stuff' - things, people, philosophy, even religion, but to have faith in a wonder-God named Jesus Christ...oh, but that's different. Is it, really?? After hearing umpteen arguments about faith, I have come to conclude it all boils down to 1 issue - we just wanna believe what/who we wanna believe. Simple as that. Just like trusting a GPS - we choose to. Rightly or wrongly.

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight"...Proverbs 3:5-6

CNY shots click here

A Roof At What Cost?

We had an interesting discussion in my church cell meeting on Friday nite. The topic was about freedom, in particular from financial debt. Everybody was of coz agreed that all of us have at one time or another, and/or are still 'in debt' in the sense that there were/are financial commitments in our lives. Especially the 'big' ones like housing, car and/or credit card loans. The spin-off was whether we could avoid incurring them, to be totally debt-free ie not owing $ for this, that or the other thing we 'have to have'.  The logic goes that things such as a roof over our heads for our families and at least 1 car to move around for work is a necessity these days. Especially these days, and especially at the rate prices of houses are going through the roof (pun intended). No argument with that. Period.

Indeed when I was just starting out in life, that was precisely what I worked towards....a good job, car, house, husband, family, (no, I don't mean humans are 'acqusitions' as such). Nothing wrong with such desires, and indeed I was blessed with all these along the journey of my life. But I remember after my husband's funeral,  as I sat on the floor, faced with a debt listing of $600k comprising 2 house/car mortgages and compounded credit card debts over the years, and trying to compute that with my then-monthly income of barely $1000 per month and living expenses of 3 growing kids, I was so shocked I couldn't even cry. By the way, that was the first time in my 40 years of living that I had to deal with balancing a cheque account all on my own. Yes, there was my husband's govt pension as his surviving widow, and there were some insurance monies on his life policy, but that couldn't even scrape off the bottom of the mountain of debt I was up against. When I look back, I honestly don't know how I made it through, so I can only say it had to be by the grace of God that after 4 years, I was totally debt-free, less 1 house and 1 car in the process. What's more, although we didn't have any fancy meals on the table or any branded clothes, my kids never had to starve or go begging.

A few years ago, when my eldest got her first job and her first serious relationship, she started talking about buying her own house. Before I would have patted her on the back, told her what a good responsible adult she was, and encouraged her all the way as a concerned mother.  But I didn't, instead I told her to think through whether she really needed to own a house.

A house is a house is a house, whether bought or rented. I remember my childhood days spent in a small upstairs room which accommodated all 3 of us  sleeping on a wooden floor on mats, with me sandwiched in between my parents (Ya, mats, not mattresses). Its size would be about a garage in some mansions these days. There was 1 miserable window that overlooked the main street, and we had 'live entertainment' thru out the nite with the never-ending 'music' of traffic along the road. The bathroom (no shower, only a cement enclosure to hold cold water from the tap) was all the way downstairs. Water-heater? What's that? The only thing that heated water was the kettle on the stove, which by the way had to be kindled the old-fashioned way using firewood. The toilet was a pit latrine, accessible through climbing up some stone steps; I absolutely hated going there, my fear was always that I or my shoes would drop into the hole. My mom's legs weren't good even then, and so she had to have a portable 'potty' for her needs...and guess who ended up having to do the daily disposal and washing?? Those were the days, (certainly not very 'good old' days) and the kind of roof I lived under. But nevertheless it was a roof over my little head. 

I had my first taste of 'luxury' when my father landed a job at the (then) MSM sugar factory, which provided free housing...man, that was the life for me...a house sooo big, we each had our own bedrooms, with extra to spare, and a swimming pool to run to every evening! When the old man retired, we 'down-graded' to a small flat, cramped, but still a roof. I made the big shift to the big city when I enrolled into University and spent years in my own rented space with a bed, a foldable wardrobe, a table and a chair. That qualified as a room. At least the bathroom and toilet was modern and on the same level. Even after  I got married, we were still renting a room (not house) for years, till finally  we got to own our very first decent (ie got enuf rooms for a couple and first kid) apartment.

So I tell my grownup daughter who had caught the house-owning bug... a roof is a roof is just a roof.
Many question the 'wisdom' of such an attitude. After all, we should spare some thought to being 'settled' in life, instead of being at the whim and fancy of fickle and fussy landlords. As responsible, matured adults, we should think of  'our future', invest wisely and raise up our kids in a 'proper' home.  Again, I have absolutely no quarrel with that. My issue isn't about the need for a house or car or whatever. My point is ownership.... at what cost? Perhaps I have never really gotten over the initial shock of facing a debt that was impossible to repay. And throughout the years, I guess I have seen and experienced things that are worse, much worse than not owning a house (or anything for that matter) to one's name. Every Saturday, I sit down, listen to and talk with people who only have the star-studded sky as their 'roof' every nite, their whole life's possessions contained in a crumpled, half-torn back-pack or two. When you do that enuf times in a year, your whole perspective about life's priorities inevitably changes.

I am struck by how often in the Bible, when God calls, He quite literally and simply uproots people from their comfortable homes, jobs, families and circumstances. Jesus Himself declares, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head." (Mat 8:20). Come to think of it, on earth the only property that bore His name was a wooden cross, and that also He 'owned' only when He was hung dead on it.  Even right from the beginning in Genesis, Abraham the man of faith was called out from a prosperous settled lifestyle in a big city and told to go. God unfortunately didn't tell him the GPS coordinates of where he was to go. In the process, Abraham detoured twice, and actually settled down (again) first in Haran and then in Egypt, where he (again) grew rather prosperous, accumulating many possessions in the process (Gen.12:5,16). If I were Abraham, I would have done the same thing, surely it's a 'wise' thing to leave a place of famine for a land of plenty??  but God didn't think so apparently, becoz as the story goes, Abraham was practically forced out of Egypt to go back to where he had run away from. In fact it was in the land of plenty that Abraham got into plenty trouble. Pondering over this, I have oft wondered when we say, God gives us wisdom, how do we actually know what we decide is actually in His/our wisdom??

I guess Abraham must have learnt his lesson well, since apparently he deliberately moved to park himself near an oak grove, unlike his nephew Lot  who chose the 'bright lights' of the city of Sodom (Gen.13:12,18). If I were Abraham, the first thing I would have done is contact the local estate agent to put a deposit on a solid piece of landed property, or even better, build my own mansion in the promised land. After all, he had 'arrived'. Yet we are told by the time he hauled all the precious possessions he had acquired back to where God directed him, he lived " like a stranger in a foreign country.......in tents ....For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God (Heb.11:9-10) Hmmm, tents huh....kind of flimsy roof, don't you think.

It gets worse when I read further on to discover all (ya, all, not 1 or a couple) of the 'heroes' in the faith chapter of the bible  "admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth....they were longing for a better country--a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them (Heb.11:13-16). Some faced jeers and flogging, while still others were chained and put in prison. They were stoned; they were sawed in two; they were put to death by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated.... They wandered in deserts and mountains, and in caves and holes in the ground (Heb.11:36-38). I wince inwardly at the thought of such "clothes" and "homes", and cannot thank God enough I don't have to endure such discomfort and suffering.  Yet the Bible says "the world was not worthy of them... These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect" (Heb.11:39-40)

Something better...I don't belong to that category of awesomely faithful ones. Purely out of His goodness and generosity, God has blessed me with so much more than a prison..He hasn't required me to wander around much, or to live like a holed-up hermit; in fact quite to the contrary, I have a very decent roof over my head, tho it may be a very very old (and leaky) one. The old jalopy I drive around in may creak, squeak and make funny noises, but it gets me where I need/want to go. My family have pretty decent clothes to wear too, tho they may not have attached  designer labels. But there is 1 thing I can share with these ancient heroes... in my heart, I know exactly what they knew then ....there is something better....


For this place called earth isn't my 'home', I am truly a 'pendatang asing', as the somewhat unpopular term goes. So really I don't need to 'put roots' here. I don't need to 'own' anything to feel secure, becoz my security comes not from  things that can be bought with money, even 'good' things. Perhaps to many,  this may seem to be  a somewhat 'cavalier' irresponsible and unwise attitude. But I figure,  if my security comes from knowing the God who has prepared for me 'something better', way way better than anything this world can offer, why  would I need to acquire anything that would result in the process of building up a mountain of debt for myself or worse for those who inherit it after me to settle?? Especially since whatever I own will pass away one day anyway; indeed Jesus says even heaven and earth itself will pass away, only His Words remain (Mat.24:35)

After all, the keys to the most fantastic place I could ever 'own' has already been given to me and I didn't even have to pay a cent for it.  Every morning when I glimpse the gold cross  hanging from the chain I wear around my neck in the mirror, I remember once again Jesus already paid the price to reserve for me the best piece of prime property beyond this world. I am told this city and its street is of pure gold, the foundations of  its walls are decorated with every kind of precious stone and its 12 gates are each made of single pearls (Rev. 21:18,19,21). If that's just the city itself, I cannot even imagine the splendor of the house that has my name engraved on the door. The cross was my husband's parting gift. It serves as a daily reminder that he is already there, waiting for me. And my house in that city stands forever. No tsunami can wash it away, no earthquake can swallow it, no thief or trespasser can get into it (and no, I don't need CCTV, alarms, security guards or boom gates). I dunno know exactly how we will get around the place, but I know for sure I won't need any Merc, BMW, Proton Saga or even a bicycle-made-for-two. As for clothes, hmmm, I am not too sure, but I think there is probably only 1 type of cloth available - fine linen, white and clean -  and 1 fashion bling-bling robe of  righteousness. With only 1 designer label attached to it - Jesus Christ. And that Name is sufficient for me to attend banquets and rub shoulders with all the VVIP saints on God's Who's Who list (don't need no special invit cards all). But most wonderful thought of all - that's  the Name that admits me into the company and presence of God Himself on His throne.


No wonder Abraham chose to live in tents. Easy come, easy go on earth. But beyond earth, he saw, and is now living in 'his' something better. But coming back to my daughter, we are at it again, this year...considering the (crazy) times we live in... to buy or not to buy, to own or not to own......

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also".... Matthew 6:19-21